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Blind and Visually Impaired Community

Full History - 2016 - 10 - 16 - ID#57roc4
7
I'm afraid to ask people out because I don't think they would want to date someone who'll eventually go blind (self.Blind)
submitted by remigusvarg
I just want to say I don't think you're a bad person if you declined an offer do date someone you know will go blind and require lots of assistance in the future. Or, I don't know. Every since I got my diagnosis a year a go I haven't really been myself and I'm just scared of becoming a bother to the people around me. I love helping others and it feels awful to ask for help and assistance all the time now.
fejervarya 11 points 6y ago
Let your potential partners make that decision. Don't do it for them. You are more than your future blindness.
Blackphidora 4 points 6y ago
Just do it (TM)

My dad has retinitis pigmentosa, obviously he had to meet his wife in SOME way.
rumster 3 points 6y ago
If I meet a beautiful woman who is going blind - I knew within 10 years she won't be able to see me... I would think about a couple thinks. Her to sustain our relationship with a job etc... Her to sustain our relationship. And her to sustain our mental connection even after she can't see me and tell me I am her hot tubby. But after all that... All that I just said... I don't believe a disability should stop or limit someone from a relationship. I met a couple beautiful women who have been blind that I WISHED gave me a chance. It's really all dependent on YOU. Not the other person. YOU.
KillerLag 3 points 6y ago
If you don't like you ask for assistance... have you contacted any agencies to help give you some training, so you can do things more independently? That would help for not only for building skills, but confidence as well.



remigusvarg [OP] 1 points 6y ago
I know I should but I'm still struggling with the whole acceptance part
awesomesaucesaywhat 1 points 6y ago
Acceptance can take a while, especially when you know you are probably going to keep losing more vision. As cheesy as it sounds, please don't give up. All we can do is take it one day at a time and keep pushing. There are a lot of resources available and we are always here for you. I'm also struggling with the idea of dating, especially because it's hard to meet people and recognize them in other settings. But eventually it will work out.
omgnodoubt 2 points 6y ago
If I love someone, their eyesight is not going to be an issue for me. If somebody won't date you because you're blind than screw em' they're probably not super great people anyways. I've actually thought about this a lot and I know without question that I would certainly date someone if they're blind; as long as I had a connection with them and I'm attracted to them.
joeflux 2 points 6y ago
I'm not blind, but my friend is.

It was very hard for his wife when he became blind. But most of that difficulty was because of how angry he became. He was angry about losing his sight, angry at the world, at himself, at everything.

It took about a year for him to come to terms with it all, accept what had happened, and regain his routine and self sufficiency. And of course now things are much better for him and his wife.
Vaelian 1 points 6y ago
I've gone through the same, and now I'm blind and can't accept it myself, let alone expect acceptance from someone else.
Dominoezz 1 points 6y ago
I am partially sighted, and I have been with sighted and non sighted partners. It makes absolutely no difference to me and I am sure many others feel the same way. Plus I read Braille so we can share books :)
KelCougarMellen 1 points 6y ago
I'm dealing with the same problem myself and my best advice is to take things one day at a time and stay in the moment. You're not completely blind yet so get out there and soak it in. Tell your potential dates your story, you're unique. As far as the future goes we can't see that far so acting like you know what is going to happen is pointless...deal with that when it comes. Deal with today.

Edit: There is an episode of How I Met Your Mother where Barney literally goes to a museum and acts like he's going blind and has to soak in all the beauty of the world before he does, to pick up women and get laid. I suggest you do the same.
Unuhi 1 points 6y ago
Just ask someone out if you like them.
Also learn your blind skills as needed.
If I wasn't in a relationship, I would probably be more looking into dates from b/vi guys than sighted ones, in genral, but of course the person and the chemistry matters more.
I've never been with anyone blinder than me.
And definitely would not be into someone who is very sight-oriented if I were dating.
Fange_Strellow 1 points 6y ago
Everyone asks for help. Everyone needs help. You will still be able to help people, and you should try to put away feeling like a burden. You'll learn, you'll adapt, and you'll thrive if you choose to. Becoming blind, being blind is just another variation of human experience and you will always be a human. Find people who understand this, and those people will be the ones you have always been looking for, even when you had sight.
wtfgiraffe18 1 points 6y ago
I'm sighted but it wouldn't matter to me if my partner was sighted or blind.
MaotheJoo 1 points 6y ago
If they fall in love with your personality they wont let your disability stop them
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