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Blind and Visually Impaired Community

Full History - 2017 - 04 - 28 - ID#686wqm
6
Would you be offended if someone asked you if you needed help even if you don't need any? (self.Blind)
submitted by iDoomfistDVA
Learned that my neighbour is blind, very unsure if I can ask if she needs help.

I just learned that a friend has a blind mother and her eyesight is the same as a sewing needle.

Her son said she would be glad to hear people offering to help her out, but knowing her son very well I can't really trust him.

So again, would you be offended if someone asked you if you needed help even if you don't need any? Thank you!

Edit: Bunch of good answers, thank you! <3
fastfinge 9 points 6y ago
No. Asking is the key, though. I hate it when I'm walking somewhere, and someone just grabs my arm without even asking. Similarly, when I'm working in the kitchen, and someone just starts helping, without saying anything. I probably had what I was doing all planned out, and now you've moved stuff so I can't find it, or gotten me off schedule, or whatever. If someone asks, sometimes I'll want help, and sometimes I won't. As long as you take "no" as a valid answer, then it's not offensive. Sometimes I want to do things myself, even if it's harder for me and I'm slower at it, because I want the practice, or I just enjoy doing it. Other times, though, I'm in a hurry, or it's something I already know how to do but hate doing, and would be glad of help.
iDoomfistDVA [OP] 4 points 6y ago
Thank you, didn't even think about having someone help without asking, something I hate personally. Great answer, I will be sure to ask her whenever I see her!
angelcake 7 points 6y ago
I would just ask. Something along the lines of "hey it's clear that you're really independent but if you're ever in a pinch and need a hand with something just let me know".
iDoomfistDVA [OP] 2 points 6y ago
Great, didn't think about this. I'm not really a people person I guess. Thank you!
angelcake 3 points 6y ago
The fact you're asking says a lot about you. All of it good.
iDoomfistDVA [OP] 1 points 6y ago
Thank you, warms my heart <3
KillerLag 6 points 6y ago
The best way to go about offering help is to introduce yourself (don't assume people will recognize your voice. Even with coworkers I've worked with for years, it can be tricky to recognize voices), then offer them assistance. If they don't need any, they are free to turn it down.

Some people get super sensitive about it, but it's fairly rare.
iDoomfistDVA [OP] 3 points 6y ago
Thank you, will do!
Vaelian 3 points 6y ago
Not offended, but annoyed. I don't get out of my comfort zone so I don't need any help, and the people who provide help are denying me experiences that I should have on my own because they won't be there to assist me all the time. If I need help I'll ask for it, but before that I prefer to try and fail.
iDoomfistDVA [OP] 1 points 6y ago
Yeah, better wording on your part, thank you. I will at least have her know that if she ever want me to help her I'm available.
awesomesaucesaywhat 3 points 6y ago
Maybe offer something if specific to help with. Grass mowing, a ride to the store, etc.
iDoomfistDVA [OP] 1 points 6y ago
Good tips, thank you!
cupcake6740 3 points 6y ago
No just make sure you don't treat her in the "childish you can't do anything" way. I love when people offer me help because, even though I'm partially visioned, I still need help.
The best way to say it is to ask if they ever need anything you're there to help. Just don't suggest because they are blind they can't do anything.
iDoomfistDVA [OP] 1 points 6y ago
Thank you, I will!
zombiegamer723 2 points 6y ago
I don't see (heh) a problem with it. Don't just try and do it for me (example, when I'm standing in the elevator and ask you what floor, don't just reach over and hit the button for me...that kinda irks me a bit), but I certainly don't mind if you just say something like "Hey man, need some help?"

At least with me, just make it casual. Like if you saw someone holding or carrying a heavy box, just a friendly offer for help. Even if I'm just fine doing whatever I'm doing, the thought is definitely appreciated.
tallin32 3 points 6y ago
I am never offended by people that ask first, accept "no" for an answer, and go on about their day. I will admit a bit of puzzlement at people that ask, as I'm walking to work, the store, the subway, the Empire State Building, or the cheese shop on 20th and Broadway, if I'm "OK", and was a bit taken aback by the security guard who asked randomly if I was heading for the library for the blind (ten blocks in the oppositee direction from where I was heading), but the only things I can think of thet really could be said to offend me is adopting the "baby voice" (assume you're talking to an equal, please) and folks that reach out and grab, which would have gotten you a stern lecture from your teacher in kindergarten.
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