Blind and Visually Impaired Community
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From the "did you really just go there?" Department. (self.Blind)
submitted 5.235135641718107y ago by Myntrith
I'm taking care of my elderly, blind mother. Getting her to eat enough throughout the day is always a challenge.
I was talking to my sister who, for all her good intentions, is sometimes out of touch. She was trying to offer various suggestions, all of which I've tried. Among those was one suggestion to sit and eat with her. My schedule doesn't always allow for that.
So she says, "Maybe just tell her you're sitting down to eat with her. She won't know."
*Ahem*
Is this a thing? Do people assume that just because you're blind, you're so unaware of your environment that you can't even tell the difference between sharing a meal and dining alone?
And even putting that aside, even if such a rouse were successful, I would find it ... disrespectful if not outright contemptuous.
I do sit and eat with her when I can. But to say I'm going to, then walk out, and to expect her not to know the difference ... really?
I was talking to my sister who, for all her good intentions, is sometimes out of touch. She was trying to offer various suggestions, all of which I've tried. Among those was one suggestion to sit and eat with her. My schedule doesn't always allow for that.
So she says, "Maybe just tell her you're sitting down to eat with her. She won't know."
*Ahem*
Is this a thing? Do people assume that just because you're blind, you're so unaware of your environment that you can't even tell the difference between sharing a meal and dining alone?
And even putting that aside, even if such a rouse were successful, I would find it ... disrespectful if not outright contemptuous.
I do sit and eat with her when I can. But to say I'm going to, then walk out, and to expect her not to know the difference ... really?
LanceThunder 10 points 5y ago
If your sister wasnt joking then shes an idiot. Its not just disrespectful, it wouldn't work for more then 2 min. But she really had to be joking.
OutWestTexas 10 points 5y ago
So if your sister closes her eyes, she can’t tell if someone is sitting next to her?
Myntrith [OP] 5 points 5y ago
That would appear to be a reasonable extension of her logic.
Amonwilde 5 points 5y ago
I've seen this kind of attitude before. It comes of having the privilege to never have to think for two actual seconds straight about what it would be like to be blind.
AllHarlowsEve 5 points 5y ago
There are people who will physically grab you to try and put you into a cab if you're waiting on the sidewalk because they presume you don't know where you are or where you're going.
Yeah, people assume blind people are so inept that it's a wonder we don't all die of our own stupidity.
Yeah, people assume blind people are so inept that it's a wonder we don't all die of our own stupidity.
redstone1337 3 points 5y ago
Can't say I've been shoved into a cab, but I can definitely attest to the gross invasion of personal space. Probably the two worst examples I can think of were when I was at rehab. I was under blindfold walking down the street. There was no tactile distinction between the parking lot on my left and the sidewalk. I bumped into a parked car, realized I had veered into the parking lot, and started making my way back to the sidewalk when a woman slides her arm through my elbow\-\-square dance style\-\-to "help" me back to the sidewalk. Keep in mind I had already realized where I was and was making a course correction. The other time, I was at a post office, innocently asked where the end of the line was, and a girl grabbed my hips and steered me there like we were in a conga line. Neither of these people asked to touch me in any way, and I had no idea the first lady was even there before she decided to play personal space invaders with me.
An honorable mention has to go to the morning I was on the bus to work when an absolutely plastered lady got on and started talking to my dog. She attempted to pet her, but in her drunken state, missed the mark and started petting my leg in stead. I quickly relocated to the other side of the aisle, but for the rest of the trip she kept groping the air a foot or two in front of where my dog was lying in a futile attempt to pet her.
Speaking of busses... these crazy memories are just flooding back to me right now... another bus related incident at rehab this time, I had forgotten to slip my ID lanyard under my shirt when I left the building, and while on the bus a woman grabs my ID and starts looking at it... while it was still around my neck.
Why do people think this sort of thing is OK?!
An honorable mention has to go to the morning I was on the bus to work when an absolutely plastered lady got on and started talking to my dog. She attempted to pet her, but in her drunken state, missed the mark and started petting my leg in stead. I quickly relocated to the other side of the aisle, but for the rest of the trip she kept groping the air a foot or two in front of where my dog was lying in a futile attempt to pet her.
Speaking of busses... these crazy memories are just flooding back to me right now... another bus related incident at rehab this time, I had forgotten to slip my ID lanyard under my shirt when I left the building, and while on the bus a woman grabs my ID and starts looking at it... while it was still around my neck.
Why do people think this sort of thing is OK?!
bradley22 4 points 5y ago
People think that if we're standing on a sidewalk (pavement) and standing near the road that we want to cross it. I'm completely fine with them asking and when I say no, walking away. It's when they insist that I need help I get annoyed. I've had a woman insist on helping me cross the road when I didn't need to cross it. Why? Because it will help her carma or something... I have nothing against religious people at all but come on, don't bring your religion into this when all you're doing is forcing someone to cross a road they didn't want to cross.
Loving_Light 3 points 5y ago
This is the worst. I know they mean well, but I had this random lady just grab me and guide me across the road one time. Yes, I did happen to be crossing, but I was very familiar with that area, and knew exactly where I was going.
I made a point to give her a rather dirty look.
I made a point to give her a rather dirty look.
snow671 3 points 5y ago
It's nothing new. You can search Reddit to discover how inept the majority seem to think blind folk are. Maybe because it's difficult to relate, I don't know.
redstone1337 5 points 5y ago
search /r/showerthoughts for “blind” sometime. Prepare for frustration.
snow671 6 points 5y ago
https://www.reddit.com/r/Showerthoughts/comments/8i3qyz/how_do_blind_people_know_if_theyre_awake_or_asleep
Oh my god
Oh my god
StaleTheBread 1 points 4y ago
Even if someone were to not notice, imagine how rude you’d come off just eating with someone in complete silence.
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