Blind and Visually Impaired Community
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Help (self.Blind)
submitted by iwillcontribute
Hello everyone.
This coming week I will be taking over as my dads Home Help Provider. Previously it was my little sister. About 4 years ago my 55 year old father suffered from complications with his diabetes. In 6 months he went from a completely independent normal life to living life as a blind amputee (right leg from knee down). These past few years have bin hard but it is time for him to be a little more independent. Currently he needs help getting dressed, eating, and being mobile. He is in a wheel chair, but has a prosthetic he is scared to use because he can not see. I would like to get to a point where i can leave him something to eat and he can warm it in the micro but i don't know how to get there. I understand that it is a lot to go through but for the past year he has started dialysis for his kidneys and his health is deteriorating because he has no hope. I know his life will never be the same, but it is time he gets some of his life back. I have no idea what i am doing though, which is why i am here. I will appreciate any tips or "hacks" or links to where i can educate myself. Also, If anyone can point me in the right direction for help with dialysis that would be great.
Edit to add: he is completly blind in his left eye but sees shadows in hid right eye if it is a bright environment. He had surgery about a month ago to try to help but it was a failure.
P.S. sorry for my grammar.
This coming week I will be taking over as my dads Home Help Provider. Previously it was my little sister. About 4 years ago my 55 year old father suffered from complications with his diabetes. In 6 months he went from a completely independent normal life to living life as a blind amputee (right leg from knee down). These past few years have bin hard but it is time for him to be a little more independent. Currently he needs help getting dressed, eating, and being mobile. He is in a wheel chair, but has a prosthetic he is scared to use because he can not see. I would like to get to a point where i can leave him something to eat and he can warm it in the micro but i don't know how to get there. I understand that it is a lot to go through but for the past year he has started dialysis for his kidneys and his health is deteriorating because he has no hope. I know his life will never be the same, but it is time he gets some of his life back. I have no idea what i am doing though, which is why i am here. I will appreciate any tips or "hacks" or links to where i can educate myself. Also, If anyone can point me in the right direction for help with dialysis that would be great.
Edit to add: he is completly blind in his left eye but sees shadows in hid right eye if it is a bright environment. He had surgery about a month ago to try to help but it was a failure.
P.S. sorry for my grammar.
MakeThisLookAwesome 4 points 4y ago
iwillcontribute [OP] 2 points 4y ago
Thank you!
ENTJ351 2 points 4y ago
He can absolutely be independent if he so chooses. If vision is only his issue and he has no balance issues or hearing losss it’s purely psychological from there. You have to somehow convince your father that that going blind is not the end of the world, that there is hope. I am diabetic myself but very mildly. I haven’t lost any limbs yet, praise the Lord. I don’t think blind = can’t use prosthetics. Now I think of it I know a lady who does, but she can’t walk very long distances on a hot day, but for sure she gets out and about. She could be more independent, but the larger point is not about her. She gets dressed, self feeds, and get’s out. Learning that he won’t fall or trip because he is blind is key. Hooking up with something like a blind resources place and getting a o)m instructor may be your first step. Also, stuff like don’t be afraid to use that leg, encouraging him, showing him gently he could trust himself and your judgment is important. With real legs or without blind people can do anything. I have a 75 years old friend and he has more issues, hearing loss, and balance issues and he still gets up, does things and such. An artificial leg isn’t unusable. Now it has just become a part of your body so why not? It’s blindness that is holding him back. Blindness has no need to hold anyone back and it has. It’s very unfortunate. I’ll tell you, I am a university student as a blind person and I travel around the county and the adjacent orange county. I mean it would be nice to have a real leg, but honestly... I don’t use my leg to feel things. It isn’t that important to my well being as a blind person. If I had a leg that I could not feel with that’s fine. I use my legs to walk. That is not a sighted or blind issue. If I had artificial legs I could do as much as I can now. Maybe be a litttle more conscious of what is around me, but by and large, really, what’s the difference?
iwillcontribute [OP] 1 points 4y ago
Yes this is my line of thought. I feel that by waiting on him hand and foot i will be enabling his helplessness if that makes any sense? He has had a couple of years to get acclimated to his situation and while it was life changing it isnt life ending. Sometimes I wonder if i am being to hopefull and it really is the beggining of the end for him but I dont want to give up without trying myself.
ENTJ351 1 points 4y ago
You’re exactly right. And you’re not being too hopeful. Help him realize his potential and where he can contribute and get back on his feet. No one will say it’s easy.
NewTown_BurnOut 1 points 4y ago
Unfortunately, I have no advice to give here. My father just lost his vision completely over the past few weeks due to diabetes and I just want to say that I really feel for you. This has been such a life changing event, and it’s really scary for us right now. I’m not the religious type, but I will be thinking positive thoughts for you and your family <3
iwillcontribute [OP] 2 points 4y ago
Im not religious either but I wont lie I have prayed a lot just because at one point that was all i could do but dont ask me to who im praying cause i dont know but I'm sending you some internet hugs❤
NewTown_BurnOut 1 points 4y ago
I totally feel that same way, sometimes it’s just nice to focus and think hard as if a higher power out there may be listening. Thank you for the advice about cuts/pimples it’s something I’ll be monitoring closely with him and myself. As unfortunate as the situation may be now i hold hope that some positives will come of it. What if my father never lost his vision and had further complications from diabetes later that could’ve been life-threatening? Now he is taking his blood sugar seriously and stopped drinking which could steer him clear of an even worse fate than loss of vision right?!
iwillcontribute [OP] 1 points 4y ago
I'm sorry to hear that diabetes is a bitch and people who have it need to be just a bit more cautious. Remember to take care of any wounds no matter how small this includes pimples or pretty much anything that breaks the skin. Its bin a couple of years since this first happened but I had my first baby recently and it kills me that she will never know the dad that I had growing up.
oceanbreze 1 points 4y ago
Where the HELL are his social workers, doctors, mobility specialists, or health educators? He should have had therapy from an expert to assist him in mobility and independence. It sounds like the professionals have fucked up when it comes to his care. Not you or your sister but the people who are paid to help him take care of himself as much as possible. He is too young to be deteriorating so quickly.
iwillcontribute [OP] 1 points 4y ago
Holy fuck sorry for the wall of text.
iwillcontribute [OP] 1 points 4y ago
So when he got sick it all started with a tiny cut under a toe(the kind that are common in the colder months) that somehow got infected and they first cleaned it and sent him home, then surgery to clean it and sent home, then they amputated the toe and at this point he was prescribed a painkiller that left him unresponsive 1 night after being home and back to the hospital we went. He had to have a breathing tube put in and the main focus was to get him stabilized. At this point the doctors didnt give a shit about his toe and his infection progressed. Once he was stable they decided to amputate half his foot (all his toes) but the infection was to far up and they amputated to below the knee. Now while all of this is going on(2 months total) he was supposed to be getting his functioning eye(1 eye was already a goner) cleaned by a specialist every other week to prevent his vision from getting worse but no matter how much we tried noone listened and it took a back seat. When he was released from the hospital they sent him to a rehab place for a week and then he was home. At the rehab center he was pumped with painkillers and he doesnt even remember that week he spent there or most of his hospital stay for that matter. This year he had to begin dyalisis for his kidneys which turned out to be a blessing in disguise because now he HAS to get out of the house 3 times a week for hours at a time and he is starting to make friends at the dyalisis center and it seems like he looks forward to it even though he feels like shit after. (He asked if he looked alright👀👀) I know I'm not a professional but I feel with some guidance I can make it work.
oceanbreze 1 points 4y ago
He STILL needs a social worker, mobility specialist, likely a therapist. You cannot do it all. If his insurance covers it. also in home support.
iwillcontribute [OP] 1 points 4y ago
His social worker will be making a home visit this week to evaluate how many hours of in home support he needs(what i will be doing). I will ask her about therapy but i am pretty sure he got all that medical will cover. Thank you.
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