CloudyBeep 3 points 4y ago
This is quite a long post; I sincerely hope you read all of it, preferably aloud because you are more likely to remember it that way.
Imagine that you are on a small boat far out in the ocean, and you see a storm coming. But you think it won't be that big, so you keep rowing further out. But the storm begins, and you begin to get cold from the wind and rain. But you keep paddling, because you have a destination to reach, and you don't want to be stopped by a storm. You know that storms kill people, but you are stronger than that. You are getting colder, but you keep paddling. You eventually get hypothermia, which could have been avoided if you have rowed back to shore when the wind and rain were not as strong.
Now imagine that you live in the desert, and you have to walk for hours every day to get water. But one day your urn breaks, and the water begins to spill. What do you do?—Do you continue to use a faulty urn that has passed its usefulness as a water-carrying device, or do you use a newer urn?
Like the broken urn, your eyes are no longer useful. Like the broken urn, using them is pointless and requires much more effort than if you were to use alternative techniques.
Many of the accommodations you have just been given are not going to be effective. Large print, magnifiers and the like are only useful for people who can depend on their vision, not for you who have stated that are forced to take rest breaks and suffer both physical pain from eye strain and incessant eye-shaking.
The other accommodations of a reader and scribe are also only useful if you have people to help you. Don't you want to be self-sufficient—to be able to know that you can be independent? Without them, you are unable to read and write. Literacy is a basic human right.
You have a choice. You can row further into the metaphorical storm, where using your vision will lead to stress and pain; or you can make a promise to yourself to stop using your vision, replacing it with alternative techniques like a screen reader, braille and a long white cane, not just in exams, but all the time.
An essential question you need to ask yourself is why you are continuing to use primarily visual techniques. Is it out of bravery? It can't be, because brave people know when their efforts are hopeless. Is it out of denial? By continuing to deny the obvious, you are only rowing further into the storm; will you continue to deny the futility of rowing in the storm when there are hurricane-strength winds? Is it out of a fear of being different? You're already blind, and everyone knows it, so acting more blind can't hurt your reputation. Is it out of a fear for the future? Just look at the blind people like us who can stand proudly and are not ashamed of being blind.
When I was your age, I felt comfortable with my blindness. I could read braille for long periods of time with no fatigue; can you do this using your techniques? I could walk comfortably without assistance or incident in all lighting conditions, putting full trust in my cane; can you do this using your techniques? I used assistive technology to effortlessly complete schoolwork, and I didn't need to take rest breaks; can you do this using your techniques?
The decision is yours: Do you want to continue using a broken urn; do you want to keep sailing into the storm? If not, share this post with your parents so they understand your change of heart, then celebrate with them because you have come to understand that you are no longer going to be limited by your ineffective vision. And if you decide that you would like to stay away from the blind community, I hope you think about what users like u/-shacklebolt- and I have suggested from time to time, because if your vision continues to decline, you will have no choice in accepting the reality of your vision impairment in a few years' time; but if you decide to embrace it earlier, I know you will be much better for it.
-shacklebolt- 3 points 4y ago
But you're asking the same vague questions, and when given recommendations you are not displaying any indication whatsoever that you are taking those recommendations into account, simply asking the same question again.
The issue is you're not going to get better answers if you aren't reasonably engaging in a conversation about the answers you've gotten already, or better describing the type of advice you're looking for.
You also need to be willing to consider the idea that there's *nothing* we can tell someone with significantly low vision and other visual issues that's going to miraculously make reading large amounts of large print fast, painless, and easy. This is why you have been recommended other techniques.