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Blind and Visually Impaired Community

Full History - 2019 - 09 - 08 - ID#d16sno
13
Do blind/VI people get in more arguments and negative social situations? (self.Blind)
submitted by [deleted]
[deleted]
Mokohi 10 points 3y ago
Having been to both a blind boarding school and a sighted school throughout my education, I don't think so. Sighted people actually seem to fight more, in my opinion. People get the wrong impressions from facial expressions and that would often cause drama. It took me years to realize that a large part of why I was bullied was because everyone thought I was giving them a nasty look when in fact my eyes just look different.
JuJutsukaTim 6 points 3y ago
People misinterpret my body language all the time, that's for sure. I'm legally deafblind, and thus there are two problems:

1) I need to be careful to keep an appropriate facial expression up. If I'm really focused on something I think about, my expression just goes blank/slack, which people interpret as sad, tired, unmotivated, even angry.

2) At the same time, people always talk to me louder, which makes them sound angry/annoyed by default, and I automatically respond by being defensive.

So, for me, it's an absolute yes. People overinterpret my lack of facial expression or body language, whilst I feel like they're constantly yelling at me.

Also people often grab my wrists, fingers, cane... without permission, which feels intrusive. Takes lots of effort to always stay polite and ask them gently if they could please let go.
biologicalfemale852 3 points 3y ago
I think it depends.

Lately, as I am getting older, I find I am less tolerant of people grabbing at me/my cane etc and sick and tired of people clearly talking about me/whispering about my sex life. I'm more prone to snapping but I feel that I now have the limits of a sighted person when it comes to getting irritated. Years ago I feel I was very accommodating towards rude and intrusive people, almost like a push over.

I think there is also an expectation that blind/VI people are like little mice and are always going to "be nice" and dont have bad days/irritation. For example, at the end of a long day after so many frustrating and difficult interactions with members of the general public I'll probably be more prone to getting annoyed at a small thing that I wouldn't usually get irritated with earlier in the morning.etc
theorphancameleon 3 points 3y ago
I am visually impaired, I see big surfaces but not details, which means I don't see faces. I realised recently that it was an issue in my relationship as my partner is a quiet guy, and I miss out on a lot of nuances in our conversations by not seeing his face. It also makes it harder to have empathy sometimes, mostly during fights, because I am not confronted with a big part of his reactions. This was a shitty epiphany, but now I need to find a way to work with this.
Other than with my SO I don't really suffer from this issue, most people are very verbal and I can read their voices well enough to be "in tune". But quiet people truly freak me out because I have no idea what they're thinking and how they are reacting to what I've said. I'm learning to get comfortable with those silences and not taking them personally.
Hope this helps...
razzretina 3 points 3y ago
I don’t think so. The only thing that might make us more prone to arguments is that we have a constant extra stress on us mentally from having a disability (the smarmy teaching term is setting event, something outside our control which the people we interact with have no idea about; blindness is a setting event by itself, but then you add on other stressors and sometimes it can be a bit much). But even with that, I find that most people leave us out of things like fighting (at least once you get out of school). Nobody wants to be that asshole who hit a blind guy. :D If you’re naturally outspoken you might get into more arguments but that’s not a blind thing; anyone can be that person on the right day or over the right subject (talking religion or politics is the most sure fire way to start a fight with anyone ha ha XD).
Amonwilde 2 points 3y ago
I think you need to assume good intentions as much as possible. It's far better to assume the best and be wrong then to misread a good intention as a bad one.

As a low vision person, I'm attuned to body language, and I find body language tells much more than the face, which people usually learn to control. The face is a vehicle of intentional expression and the body is a vehicle of unintentional expression. Of course, if you're totally blind you're also locked out of reading the body, and I'm not sure if you could replace that information by listening to the voice.
Badassmotherfuckerer 2 points 3y ago
I don't think so either. I've been both sighted and VI and went to blind schools and am going to college currently.
I can't speak to others who have never had visual experiences, but I can still pick up expressions and vibes through tone of voice, etc. I assume most other people can as well? Often times those are associated with whatever facial expressions or body language is being expressed.
But that's just my experience.
8i8oio 1 points 3y ago
I am an extrovert. I’m usually humming out in public, and overly friendly ~ I’ve always been this way, even when I had my sight. I never get in fights and everyone is nice when I ask for help.

But I’m a female. I’m white. I have a heart shaped face and wear bows in my hair.

So I want to say “people will respond by how you treat them” and it’s partly true, but I also realize not everyone can be a bubbly extrovert. I suggest trying out different behaviors, minor changes that still feel like “YOU”, and see if it helps. Maybe it’s tone? Maybe it’s body language? And maybe it’s not, but it’s worth a try if only to give you peace of mind.
bscross32 1 points 3y ago
I don't get into arguments unless I'm the one who either starts it or injects myself into it.
quanin 0 points 3y ago
I don't know that blind people are more dramatic than sighted, per say. I do think the blindness community's a whole hell of a lot smaller, so the drama queens in that community get noticed more than they aught to be, but other than that, I don't think there's any real difference. Most of the entitled whiners would be entitled whiners if they could see; they'd just find something else to whine about.
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