Hey, glad you dropped in!

You are very much not alone. I had/have the same problems. Some of them don't really go away. People are always going to walk away from you and not say anything and you're always going to feel like a rube when you realise. If you can learn to laugh off the blind girl moments you'll have a much easier time of it.

Some of these problems are just high school being generally shitty. Teenagers are obsessed with status and in-groups and being different doesn't help you fit in. If you plan on getting some sort of tertiary education you'll usually find the social groups are much less restrictive and much more inclusive. It actually does get better. It just sucks to have to wait for that to happen.

In regard to advocating for yourself, definitly practice. Start with something small that's really easy for people to do. An example from my high school days was asking for homework to be printed on white instead of coloured paper. This was actually a really easy thing for my teachers to do. So much so that they just stopped using coloured paper for the whole class and as far as I'm aware my teachers never went back.

The more success you have with the smaller stuff, the more you can build yourself up to advocating for the bigger stuff. Eventually you'll become mean and nasty just like me when I politely explain to people who manhandle me on public transport that they should first ask me if I'd like some help and if it's okay to touch me.

Seriously though, if you're falling behind in school there's a problem and it shouldn't be entirely up to you to advocate for yourself. Your parents, your teachers and whatever disability support you have should be sitting down to do an IEP with you to address these issues. I don't know where you're from but there's usually disability support services for blind/VI people who can advocate on your behalf.

I feel for your situation, I really do. I had an absolutely horrific time in school until I hit university. I wish there was a better way I could help, but if you wanna chat about this stuff or anything else really, just shoot me a message. :)

I'm a not-blind teacher but I have a student in the coming semester who sounds very much like yourself. (How crazy would that be if you were her?)

As a writing teacher, I encourage you to write about your experiences for the benefit of other students. We do an open-mic poetry session in my classes, and people explaining what it's like to be in their shoes is very powerful. (I haven't had blind or visually impaired students, but I've had some with trichotillomania and anxiety and eating disorders and many other battles.)

I appreciate you posting this, because it's helped me consider some things for my own classroom.

First, yes, they do see the cane first. That's what it's for. I like to think of mine as an asshole repeller for this reason. I have no idea how many difficult interactions Dog has saved me from and I'm glad for that. The jeeks who get past are truly stupid and determined but way fewer in number than they would be otherwise. Now, the genuine folks who want to get to know you won't be deterred.

Self advocacy is a must. No one can help you if you don't speak up but this doesn't mean you have yo carry a picket sign outside class. The IEP, if you're in the US, is a good place to start. It's a small group. Your parents can be there. You can invite teachers or notetakers or other people you trust to sit in. It's your get it done cheering section. Start there or just with your parents at home. Create a wish list of things that would help with classwork and share it with those closest to you before taking it to the larger group. Build confidence.

In asking for help, you may find allies you haven't noticed. You might also find others who need help and learn from your example.

I'm not gonna say that self advocacy will bring friends and happy times but you will have better grades and more sense of control over your school life. It's not easy. You will have asshat teachers and classes that defy accommodations but asking for help will help you find solutions. They do exist.

Blind moments happen. They hurt but they're unavoidable. You can learn to shake them off. We all must learn to do this. On that, tho, anybody who knows you or sees your cane and gets offended cause you didn't wave back isn't connecting dots. That's not on you.

You can do this. Not because others have but because you can. We have some ideas on strategies but you'll have to make them work for you. That ownership is your success. Feel free to ask how we did things. Take what feels right. Adapt what sounds possible and run with your solutions. Create your own fixes as you need them and share with others who come along.

I saw another fierce woman offer support. Now you have two. Keep a list of your resources and use them - not just us redditors but all of them. Btw, you are at the age where Voc Rehab can start helping with these issues and preparing for college. Check them out. They're no panacea but sometimes they can really come through with some solutions.

Obligatory not blind disclaimer, but you are describing the high school experience for the majority of people your age out there. Hang in there. I like to think of high school as a test for life. If you can make it through with your self esteem and personality intact, you stand a fighting chance of surviving anything else life plans on throwing at you.
Do you or your friends do anything fun outside of school? I feel like the thing that can really make or break high school is what you do when you aren't in class.
High school in a very judgmental place. Even if you were doing everything exactly the same as everyone else with nothing unique about you, people would judge you for that. Stand strong and be proud of who you are. You seem pretty great and people are attracted to people who are comfortable with themselves. The friends who are worth your time will find you if you know what you want to do and go for it. Being shy doesn't mean you can't be confident.

Do you live near a state school for the blind? If so, maybe you could get involved in activities there.

Hey thanks for sharing. I’m an old lady now but I want to tell you that I am blind and things do get better as you get older. You kind of learn that there is no hiding it and just accept it. Learn to laugh it off and keep your head up like your nose is bleeding. I know it’s hard. And it’s going to continue to be hard because let’s be honest it’s not quite fair and it fucking sucks. But eventually people will start to see you as a person and then they will see how awesome you are. But for real it does get better hang in there. Learn to love who you are your perfectly imperfect self and carry on. Much love. And for the record high school is tough no matter who you are plain and simple but it is small In comparison to the things you will face later on in your old age this is preparing you for future challenges. You got this.

Hey! This, I relate to very much and sadly, I have no solution, I just try to be myself because I don’t want to be around people who judge me like that. But it’s nice to know that we’re not alone. You are strong and amazing just the way you are.