Between kinda fucked and totally fucked.

I can’t see shit.

Like looking through a papertowel roll (tunnel vision)

and also, when I am trying to scan an unfamiliar room, it's like looking through a kaleidoscope.

Blind spots everywhere I look, but somehow not totally blind.

I see only light and dark, I can't see any colours or shapes.

There's a giant hole in the center of my vision where I don't see anything.

Can’t see shit.
I can actually see shadows, but since this serves virtually little benefit, it tends to confuse others. So, I just get to the point. It leads to fewer ignorant questions too.

Put a dirty lense that's in someone else's prescription on the end of a toilet paper roll tube and look thru it at dusk.

It's like smearing the world's shittiest laptop webcam with Vaseline.

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I have no idea what you mean when you ask me if I see black.

Like when you rub your eyes too hard and see green and red flashing patterns, only it's so much you can't see through it.

Wearing glasses with the center of the lenses severely scratched that causes distortions.

Try to put together a puzzle without known what is the full picture. This is me trying to figure out images/places I had never seen before

My vision is just as useful as a chocolate teapot in the desert at noon.

It’s like coming out of a dark movie theater into the bright sunlight

I see dumb people.

I can't see anything even slightly to the left of my direct line of sight (left homonymous Hemianopia.)

Vision is a lot more complicated than the public is led to believe.

My sight is like that South Park first person shooter game on the N64. Everything pops in when it's a few centimeter in front of me and it's very low resolution.

I see light and dark, no shape or color.
Or, I'm blind as fuck. Simple and to the point. No bullshit questions to follow also because there usually too stunned and unsure of how to effectively react.

I can see light and some shapes.