Blind and Visually Impaired Community
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Afraid to tell my future partner(arranged marriage) about my Keratoconus (self.Keratoconus)
submitted by [deleted]
[deleted]
softburrito 7 points 2y ago
Listen to those people close to you, as this really isn't that big of a deal. If you've been wearing glasses this whole time its not gonna be a surprise to find out you don't have perfect vision. Your condition is fully treatable by glasses or surgery so there's not even really any danger of going blind.
I don't mean to sound insensitive but I don't know what you're worried about, at this point your vision is near perfect and thats the case for most people even if they don't wear glasses. I'd also argue that many people on this subreddit would be ecstatic to have your vision.
At the end of the day just tell your girl casually what you have, and the potential danger now the line that you might need surgery and I feel like thats the end of it.
I don't mean to sound insensitive but I don't know what you're worried about, at this point your vision is near perfect and thats the case for most people even if they don't wear glasses. I'd also argue that many people on this subreddit would be ecstatic to have your vision.
At the end of the day just tell your girl casually what you have, and the potential danger now the line that you might need surgery and I feel like thats the end of it.
angryEyeMan 1 points 2y ago
Thank you for your support and response. My main concern is not about going blind, but I want to take opinion on what would be right thing to do about the situation with respect to my potential future partner. **Should I tell her forehand? Should I tell her when time is right once I am married?**
In both cases I am afraid of making the relationship either end or bad, specially on second option. So just looking to understand how people who are already in such situation handle such things. Thank you again. I might not be able to explain my worries clearly, but concern has arose after learning that chronic illness has been in route for many divorces.
In both cases I am afraid of making the relationship either end or bad, specially on second option. So just looking to understand how people who are already in such situation handle such things. Thank you again. I might not be able to explain my worries clearly, but concern has arose after learning that chronic illness has been in route for many divorces.
TK_Sleepytime 4 points 2y ago
I think that the amount of anxiety you feel about this condition is way out of proportion and more serious than the condition itself. People wear glasses all the time. Eyesight changes as you age. Lucky people can have a minor surgery to correct their vision and you are in that lucky group.
Where is the crisis here? Why are you imagining the worst case scenario for explaining that you still have almost perfect vision and might need to sit in a chair for 90 minutes to get that fixed?
Where is the crisis here? Why are you imagining the worst case scenario for explaining that you still have almost perfect vision and might need to sit in a chair for 90 minutes to get that fixed?
angryEyeMan 1 points 2y ago
Thank you for ur supporting reply. It helps a lot. About the crisis, only concern I have is if I need to be upfront or its not a big deal to discuss and I can just tell her when I go for my next appointment when we are together? She might say no if m upfront, by thinking the worst case possible. And other thing is if I tell her later, is it being dishonest? How do I evaluate both options.
TK_Sleepytime 1 points 2y ago
If she can't handle the fact that you get regular eye check-ups the marriage is going to be awful for you both. Do YOU think your eye condition is so serious that it makes you unable to have a healthy relationship or children? That's ridiculous. If you tell her in a way that makes it sound very grave and serious, she is more likely to think it will be a problem for her. But it's really not that serious dude! For perspective, you're currently reading advice from someone who has sight in only one eye and that eye is missing a lens and the cornea is severely scarred. It has not stopped me from having fulfilling relationships and has not scared away anyone that that wanted a meaningful relationship with me. Just tell her you get your eyes checked regularly and the name of your condition and that there's an easy treatment if it does get worse. If she breaks it off, you dodged a bullet.
angryEyeMan 1 points 2y ago
Thank you guys for ur support and encouragement. I had just fear of she prematurely taking the worst case into her mind and leave me. But this helps me with my doubt.
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