I lost my sight quite suddenly when I was a teen. I know from personal experience how difficult this will be for him as his sight continues to deteriorate and once he loses it entirely.

Because I had no warning, I had to start from scratch with basically everything after it had already happened. I'd recommend avoiding this because it was overwhelming and I felt lost for a long time.

He probably doesn't want to hear this but he needs to start preparing now. If you're in the states, he should get in touch with his state's voc rehab agency or commission for the blind;whatever his particular state calls it. He needs to start receiving training in daily living skills, orientation and mobility, Braille, and accessible technology. Learning how to understand a screen reader and how to interface with a Mac, iPhone, or Windows computer as a blind computer user will take time but it is certainly doable! The same goes for audio books. I read a lot of print books when I lost my sight and found that I was an auditory learner once I could not read print. Some people process information better when listening to it and some process/absorb it in a tactile fashion;via reading Braille for example.

Research, information, and action are all going to help him with the transition;trust me;I've been there. He's going to feel angry, bitter, depressed, and his self esteem and motivation will probably take a nose dive even though it sounds like this has already started. This is totally normal! To be frank, he's probably going to feel different, lost, and isolated. Again, it's perfectly normal.

One of the hardest things for me was that I was socially isolated when I lost my sight. Living in a small town with no other blind person in it probably didn't help. At least he has a girlfriend. I would have loved to be with somebody back then. It would have made things a little easier.

He may not believe it but it's not the end of the world. I've been blind now for 25 years and I graduated high school, graduated college, played in bands, had various jobs, lived in a foreign country for a few years, and have two kids. You just have to adapt and keep going. Things are a little easier these days with all the cool accessible devices and software that's available. I handle cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, banking as well as other financial stuff... It just takes time and effort. Things may seem really difficult but the more he does them, the better he'll get.

Down the line, he'll probably have good days and bad days. Some days things are cool and other days, all sorts of things piss me off. I wish I could drive, use a program that is not accessible with a screen reader, draw, play video games, read print, watch porn, (just being totally honest here). really though, it's good to try and focus on the things that you can do and not the ones you can't. Thinking all the time about what you can't do anymore just makes you depressed and bitter.

This is a useful sub. Feel free to shoot us any questions!

I was once like that. Fearful. Afraid. Uncertain. A whole host of things. And I feel like a moron for it lol. Now that I am near total. Ive embraced it. Even tl the point where I would decline a treatment or cure. He's scared. And thinks the worst. Its really not as bad as it is. He should talk as much as possible. Get help. Keep busy. Time with nothing but your thoughts to dwell on is unhealthy. Retaining and learning to keep as much of his independence as possible will ensure and build his confidence.

I’m really sorry to hear this, I’m so glad that you’re reaching out for advice on this. That sounds like a hell of a situation to be in. I do concur, and if you are in the UK, feel free to get in touch with one of the many charities that can offer advice on this. Probably better than me.

It’s often overlooked how much of a mental health impact sight loss can have. You suddenly lose abilities that you take for granted. It’s worth reiterating to him though that just because life is different, doesn’t mean it’s not worth going on living.You can still have a full, happy, successful and fun life even with blindness. Even though the world isn’t always geared to make people think that way.

I’m sure you don’t need me to tell you this, but your support is going to mean the world to him. I wish you both all the best

My dad lost his vision slowly due to retinitis pigmentosa. He was totally blind by middle-age and very depressed. However he attended a training school that was free in Kalamazoo Michigan. It gave him back his mobility and trained him in adaptive technology and braille. He developed a new social life, new compassion and new skills. For somebody as young as your boyfriend, there are a great deal of resources and chances to learn so that he can find meaning in life in spite of his tremendous loss. It’s really hard to lose your sight. I’m not gonna lie. It was a tragedy for our family. My dad often was suicidal for a while. However, he did get through it and it was worth it for him, he’s had many good years since. I believe this is possible for other people. I pray this can give you guys a little hope. Feel free to DM me anytime. Best wishes.

Are you in the US? He should get connected with your state department for the blind now.

I know how he feels, I have been there in my life. What happened to him sounds like what happened to me, does he happen to have retinitis pigmentosa? It might seem like the end of the world, but it truly is not. I am living very full happy life. He should look into getting some counseling about it. As odd as it may sound, so one thing I was looking forward to when my vision got to a certain point was getting a guide dog. The dog has change my life dramatically for the better.

I can understand his feeling. I‘m also 20, with clnditions that are currently stable but might lead to blindness.
I can‘t deny that it‘s scary. Especially when I was younger, I felt enormously frustrated and so powerless and was so absorbed by it that I didn‘t see the good things anymore. Getti g over this was not exactly easy, but what played a huge role in it was knowing I could still have a life. Unfortunately, we don‘t hear a lot of what blind people actually CAN do. I will share a bit of my experience below, but first a piece of advice: In a way, knowing in advice that you‘re going blind is a good thing, because it gives you time to learn necessary skills. I personally learnt braille when my vision was 0.7. Of course, it‘s not the coolest thing to do, but I‘m glad now that I did.

Personally, I ndver let my vision stop me. I went to high school, where I even was involved in lab work, and then to uni. I chose geography, which is a very visual field (and I‘m legally blind), but with some understanding and support of the department and disability office I‘m doing just fine. In fsct, I will even be guiding the freshmen around campus!😅 I‘ve also travelled across Europe and even overseas on my own. I use the vision I have left to see as much of the world as I can and put some of the world and spatial data on maps while I can. And even without any vision, you can experience so much, it‘s just different.

My father got his RP diagnosis at 21. My mother had just started dating him a year or two before. It took him a long time but by 49 he was totally blind. In that time, I and my siblings were born. I watched his struggle as his fov degraded. But through it all my dad has been such a beacon of strength and inspiration for me. I won't deny it was hard for him when it finally hit and my mother shouldered more tasks because of it. But they've never stopped loving and supporting each other. My dad rebuilds motorcycles for fun now and has for years.
I guess while I wish I had concrete advice for you both, I can say as the son of a blind man I've witnessed how life goes on. He still does what he wants (even if he refuses to learn braille XD) and computers have given him a lot of tools. And I'm glad he's still here for me and our family. Even if he doesn't want kids, friends and family are pretty valuable. Best of luck to you both.

I’ve gone from perfect vision 5 years ago having to use an app that blows up text. My hobbies are fishing scuba archery. Hunting FPS games cooking. The way I see it I lose everything but cooking if I’m blind. Fuck that I’m done at that point honestly.