I think something that helped me when I was young was a camp for blind people--it helps to have a community. I would do a search for blind/disability organizations near you where you could maybe find others to talk with who are in the same boat. That helps me feel less stressed and sometimes inspired! They have adult camps, too.

I have a super cute cane, and I think that does make me use it more--mine has a pink grip and tip, plus these fun ribbons painted on the body of it! How do you feel about guide dogs? If you are interested in getting one, you need to have dope cane skills, so that could be motivating. And then, if you do get a guide dog, you'll have all kinds of motivation for bringing the dog with you :-)

Your school experience sounds awful, and I'm sorry! All I can say is that if it's over, you have to move forward and do what you can to get to resources that you need and advocate for yourself ASAP! I would definitely recommend talking to the Department of Rehabilitation in your state if you're in the US to get any tools you need.

In general, not worrying about being judged or seen as "less than" or different is complicated. I know it will always be with me, and I do some things to cope that I shouldn't have to do, but they make me feel more confident, and I think I kind of battle some stereotypes. I am meticulous about the clothing I wear, I put on makeup if I'm going out, maybe I'll have painted nails, and I just try to have normal conversations in which I relate to people. Sometimes it's also about framing--what attitude do I have about things. I choose to feel like I'm educating people and helping them reframe what they think a disability or blindness is when I go into the world and present my best self. Sometimes it's a little tiring or I don't feel like doing it, and that's okay. But when I do, I feel like I'm helping the whole community :-)

Hey.

A way you may find useful to use your stick more is to have it already unfolded by your front door, so its just something else to pick up on your way out along with your phone and keys for example.

Something else I found helpful was taking it to a place that I already felt comfortable. For me it was a theatre group, you may have, or be able to join in with, a different hobby where you you could use your cane surrounded by people who will most likely be supportive and that may give you some confidence and lessen your anxiety.

For learning braille, some local councils offer free basic braille sessions, I'm not sure where you are in the world but it may help to check out the Social Services Department or local equivalent.

And yes, I flinch more at loud noises than I used to. I didn't lose my sight until my early 20s but I have noticed that I have flinched more and more as the last 9 years have gone by. You'll get used to it eventually, it's annoying as all hell but you'll get used to it. My personal theory is that your brain is scared of what it can't see and when it hears a loud noise near you, it expects to see something corresponding to it and when it can't it triggers a small fear response.

Hope some of this helps. Shout up if you need anything else!

You could try to find a therapist. I don't see how I, an internet stranger, can actually help you. I say this as a person with similar issues. I'd say for me it's a question of not thinking about it till it's not a problem anymore, but that's way easier said than done.

Like the other guy said I was very twitchy for the first few months but it went away. If this is a situation you've been in for ages I don't know what to suggest, other than maybe pay someone to follow you around and occasionally let off fireworks or leap out and yell "boo!" every so often so you get used to it. I'm almost serious. Well not the fireworks.

As to the community stuff, that's okay, it's always fun to hang out with like minded people, but do that in the full and total understanding that it isn't the real world. You can't spend your whole life only in the company of other people with sight issues. You will always meet people who don't get it and you need to be prepared to handle that, ideally without pissing anyone off. For me it's pretty mechanical, it doesn't require quick thinking. Anyone who hangs out with me for a few days will hear me use the same phrases on random people again and again. It's not that hard. I find myself behaving like a radio DJ on medical grade stimulats. Perky voice: OK everyone, why don't we go over there and do this, could you maybe show me where the right chair is, that's great, excellent, thanks, woo hoo isn't this all awesome fun!

Dealing with sight stuff is one thing, dealing with other people's reaction to sight stuff is skill you need. They don't know what they're doing, why would they. It's on you.

As to the cane thing, use the cane. Yes, people will notice. Personally I like to put it away when I am not actually using it in that moment then it isn't this sort of omni present thing in my existence, but that's really annoying to keep folding it up and stuff, so it's a choice.

And being tired is normal. Being blind is like having a whole extra job to do on top of whatever you're actually doing. If you want to achieve anything in life you have to get used to the idea of basically doing two jobs at once and falling into bed absolutely ruined every night. It's worth it. And yeah half the stuff I post on here is done when I'm just about to fall into bed so you know. Maybe don't assume I'm the expert.