Blind and Visually Impaired Community
↑
1
↓
Was this rude of me?? (self.Blind)
submitted by Own-cheesecakes
My cousin is a college senior and wants to be a teacher for the blind. She can fully see.
So we took a close up picture together today at a family party and I thought she looked beautiful and she’s goes (through texts) .. “ are you crazy l look pale and fat”. she’s literally a stick and so tan. So I go “I think you’re blind , look at your eyes they look so blue” and she goes “yikes”
Do you think I offended her?? I didn’t even realize that I used the word blind when I said this . I didn’t answer her yet. Now I feel weird . What do you think help
So we took a close up picture together today at a family party and I thought she looked beautiful and she’s goes (through texts) .. “ are you crazy l look pale and fat”. she’s literally a stick and so tan. So I go “I think you’re blind , look at your eyes they look so blue” and she goes “yikes”
Do you think I offended her?? I didn’t even realize that I used the word blind when I said this . I didn’t answer her yet. Now I feel weird . What do you think help
[deleted] 9 points 2y ago
[deleted]
rp-turtle 2 points 2y ago
This lmao
UpsideDownwardSpiral 2 points 2y ago
If you did offend her, it would be a case of being (unreasonably) offended by proxy.
It's ("are you blind?") a commonly used term, and isn't offensive.But, sometimes people are so scared of offending someone that they try to police themselves to an extreme. While this comes from a place of empathy (for the most part) it's unnecessary.
I would put this in the same lane as saying 'did you see that XXXX happened' to a blind person. Obviously they aren't actually seeing anything, but I don't think a blind person expects anyone to actually find a different way to express that- it's unreasonable.
TL:DR You are getting hung up on the unreasonable possibility that your perfectly normal expression is going to offend someone who really wouldn't have any reason to be offended- let alone on the behalf of another person.
​
Funny story. Before I lost my vision I often used the term "Geez, am I blind?!" when I couldn't find something that ended up being right in front of me. I had to stop saying that because it always lead to awkward silence from whomever was around me, because obviously, yes, I am indeed blind (now).
edit: I had to stop saying it because it was obvious that the people around me felt awkward- as if I was going to realize what I said and feel bad that I was actually blind now. I was perfectly happy to continue saying it ironically, ::eyeroll::
It's ("are you blind?") a commonly used term, and isn't offensive.But, sometimes people are so scared of offending someone that they try to police themselves to an extreme. While this comes from a place of empathy (for the most part) it's unnecessary.
I would put this in the same lane as saying 'did you see that XXXX happened' to a blind person. Obviously they aren't actually seeing anything, but I don't think a blind person expects anyone to actually find a different way to express that- it's unreasonable.
TL:DR You are getting hung up on the unreasonable possibility that your perfectly normal expression is going to offend someone who really wouldn't have any reason to be offended- let alone on the behalf of another person.
​
Funny story. Before I lost my vision I often used the term "Geez, am I blind?!" when I couldn't find something that ended up being right in front of me. I had to stop saying that because it always lead to awkward silence from whomever was around me, because obviously, yes, I am indeed blind (now).
edit: I had to stop saying it because it was obvious that the people around me felt awkward- as if I was going to realize what I said and feel bad that I was actually blind now. I was perfectly happy to continue saying it ironically, ::eyeroll::
Own-cheesecakes [OP] 1 points 2y ago
Thanks so much for such a detailed explanation and for making me feel better!! Been going though a tough time so I don’t want to upset someone or to have someone upset with me over something also. Thanks so much have a great day
Drunken_Idaho 1 points 2y ago
Neither of you are blind and nobody here cares either way.
Low effort post.
Low effort post.
oncenightvaler 1 points 2y ago
a) I would not say you were rude, it's a natural saying that people have. I do not believe in ablism as a thing, but then again maybe I am thick-skinned.
b) Your cousin's career choice sounds fascinating, if she wants I would be happy to talk to her about my school experiences as a totally blind student and university graduate. (29 m)
b) Your cousin's career choice sounds fascinating, if she wants I would be happy to talk to her about my school experiences as a totally blind student and university graduate. (29 m)
DrillInstructorJan 1 points 2y ago
"blind" has a lot of meanings, you're fine.
If someone specifically wants to assume a particular meaning of it just so they can get all righteously pissed off, that's their problem.
If someone specifically wants to assume a particular meaning of it just so they can get all righteously pissed off, that's their problem.
This nonprofit website is run by volunteers.
Please contribute if you can. Thank you!
Our mission is to provide everyone with access to large-
scale community websites for the good of humanity.
Without ads, without tracking, without greed.
scale community websites for the good of humanity.
Without ads, without tracking, without greed.
©2023 HumbleCat Inc • HumbleCat is a 501(c)3 nonprofit based in Michigan, USA.