What am I doing wrong? Why can't I make friends?(self.Blind)
submitted by miragerain
I'm vision/hearing impaired so I don't know how to make friends like normal people can do. Sometimes I try to talk to local people over Reddit or Facebook and I try to connect with them but then they eventually just ghost me.
Here are some of the conversations I've had with people. I'm the one in green or blue.
https://i.imgur.com/GOdu7Tl.png
https://i.imgur.com/m2HKhbE.png
https://i.imgur.com/t0LH43B.png
https://i.imgur.com/rVNYc8x.png
What am I doing wrong? How can I make friends?
Laser_Lens_416 points2y ago
Well, you could start by not posting screenshots to a subreddit for blind people
msoc9 points2y ago
Most of your conversation sounds standard, but in a few places you come across as really defeatist, saying “I guess I’ll never have friends.”
I’ve always had a problem finding good friends. If you want to be a little more superficial you can probably make some casual friends. But if you’re like me and value authentic relationships where you feel free to express yourself, sometimes that takes longer to find.
For casual friends you’ll want to steer away from difficult topics or negativity. For authentic friendship I’m not sure what to advise. I’m also not that great at it lol. But keep trying, you seem like a nice person.
CosmicBunny975 points2y ago
Ah, the irony of posting photos on a subreddit for blind people...
WarriorPrincess314 points2y ago
1. The very first thing that popped out at me is your wording. You say I'm vision/hearing impaired so can't make friends like normal. Being blind or deaf is absolutely not the reason why you're not making friends. 2. If you're blind, and your posting to a subredit for blind people, why do you think it's ok to post screenshots to people who literally cannot see them? 3. Someone else in the comments said this, and I can't help but agree. Get a personality, focus on yourself. What do you like? Do you have anything nice to say about yourself? What do you bring to the table? I'll be honest, I had the same defeatist attitude that you did, and I'll tell yuh, people really don't want to deal with other people's insecurities, especially if you've just met someone and are trying to become friends. Anyways, good luck to you and I hope you make a friend.
ginsenshi4 points2y ago
What are you into? Is usually a good starting point, like for me I like Anime, manga, star trek, star wars, most syfy and a good gay slice of life fanfic or original fic.
I'm also blind and have a hearing inpairment.
CosmicBunny971 points2y ago
Slightly off topic but how do you go about enjoying anime/manga? Sorry if that comes across as rude, I just miss watching anime XD
ginsenshi1 points2y ago
Watching anime dubbed and missing a lot of it. Haven’t read manga since 2011 When my vision started getting bad when my vision started getting worse stronger magnifiers didn’t help
Also when anime that is an English dub ‘s, but on Netflix voiceover is nice enough to read subtitles for me
CosmicBunny971 points2y ago
Yeah, missing a lot of what’s happening in tv shows and movies in general sucks. I’ll have to have a look at what Netflix offers. I haven’t read manga since maybe...2014? I was kinda hoping there’d be accessible options. What kind of anime/manga do you like?
ginsenshi1 points2y ago
Action adventure, mystery, historical steam punk, cyberpunk, slice of life Romance Magic/witchcraft One of the ones I’m watching right now is beast stars Just finished avatar the last Airbender and legend of Korra
CosmicBunny973 points2y ago
What interests you? Ask people questions and engage from there - for example, “Do you have any pets? ... Oh, I also have 2 cats! What are their names?” And for the love of God, don’t come across as needy, desperate or have low confidence. People can sense that from a mile away and it’s really unattractive. And focus on your body language too - face the person, don’t cross your arms or lean back because that comes across as standoffish
[deleted]3 points2y ago
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siriuslylupin62 points2y ago
Social skills are important watch how people interact with each other. Yeah, a negative complaining attitude is not helpful.
Also people love to talk about oh yes themselves so ask them about them and talk about them. I also find common interests very helpful. What are your interest is a good starting point. Also be a bit funny. I am usually serious but find word play to be funny. Someone said they were in canada on here and it was cold. So I joked with them hey look I found an igloo dweller. Hahaha! Talk about simple things sometimes to get conversation going. Don’t talk about yourself or solely what you’re interested in.
BenandGracie2 points2y ago
I joined a lions club. That was in 2012, and I was just elected president this year. I have several members that I consider friends.
Also, next time don't post screenshots. Some of us can't read them.
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