My best friend is blind and he always tells me that sometimes his dates always feel like they need to take care of him.

He always says, i can take care of my damn self.

Speaking from a guy's perspective here, a girl acting like your mom is not sexy. Also, if a waiter, bar tender, lift driver, or anyone else asks the blind person a question, please do not answer for them! that sort of thing drives me nuts. I'm blind;not mentally incompetent.

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I'll keep this SFW, but, visual signals don't work for a blind person. If you may want to sleep with a blind guy, it's helpful to give us verbal and tactile signals. If we don't get those, we may not realize you're interested in that and it is a handy thing to know.

Wouldn’t want to be told “You Drive”.

“What’s it like?” Fair question, but I can’t answer it. I’ve been this way all my life I don’t know what it’s like having all my vision.

If you’d like some insight into how capable blind and VI people can be - and the obstacles/ignorance they face daily have a watch of Planes Trains and Canes on YouTube. It’s a blind blogger navigating her way around and she’s really good at telling it how it is.

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For us to go on a full date and by the end of it the person decides they don’t want to be with me because I’m VI even though I tell them up front. Waste of my time

The most basic courtesy I really want, at minimum (low bar here) is when I tell people not to point/gesture and vaguely say ‘this way, over there, etc.’ or suddenly cut in front of me as we’re walking..... for them to not do those things.

Anything about being vi. Can we just get to know each other first before discussing disabilities?

Asking really stupid "funny" questions like:
"How do you know when to stop wiping after using toilet?" "How do you know when you get menstrual bleeding?" "When you're taking weed or -insert other any illegal substance here- does your sight comes back? You should try it it will cure your diseases!" "How do you walk with a cane when you're drunk?" "Are blind better at bed?" "The worse you see the better you're at bed?"

Offering stupid assistance and overall:
Ignoring my proper short assistance instructions i explained before i person really want to help me: don't pull me and lead me like a dog on a leash especially when I want to use my cane and i refused your help.
Please don't play with smartphone when i talk with you and pretend you're not doing it.
Don't go away in the middle of conversation quietly without telling me so I won't be telling the story further to nobody tell me you're leaving especially when it's busy place.
Don't take photos of me without telling me for permission.

"Do you need my assistance using the toilet I'm happy to help you're blind I'll turn away?"
Asked by informatics student on 3rd meeting, newer meet then after that. And a warning.

It cane out he was a stalker: found out my address, followed me silently without telling, got my phone number and called even at night 50 times a day I asked him to stop i blocked him moved out. He followed my blind friends found out my new address sensed "presents" and letters that he loves me at first sight that he can't live without me.
Luckily COVID came so he cannot travel so far anymore there are restrictions i even thought about going to police but how i would describe how he looks like? He lied constantly: where he lived, how many years he has, he even not told me about his hobbies and what he liked. I didn't told him about myself much at all and my social media is for close friends and family only.

Not really bring up the blindness through the whole date. Like we can talk about it if you've got questions, but if that's all you wanna ask about, I probably wouldn't want a second date.

My boyfriend is great but sometimes when we go out he has a bad habit of moving things in my area I've arranged so I know where they are at. After one night of him moving things, bullshitting me about asking the waiter for something(blind not deaf) and for getting I couldn't see and walked me into a sign, is left my cane this night so I could feel a bit normal. He volunteered to go blind folded for a day to understand and it helped him understand frustrations when people simply try to "help". They are helping themselves not you

This might sound dumb but one of the things that helps me feel sane... (This might also be good for you to try? It worked on me. I know it's not really 'avoid this' advice, so that might get me into trouble.)

My fiance and family sometimes buy me tiny things. Like, things you can get for a dollar. And sometimes they make sounds, sometimes they can be moved. I get to feel it and figure out what it is. We make a game out of it. I only get so many guesses and hints. I'm to the point of almost craving the next gift. I don't ask for any, that would ruin the magic of it. But it's almost like a small win for me each time. One of the things I got we're animal shaped magnets. They were not cartoon animals in shape, but real images. They were just big enough for me to feel it and guess. Another time I got a unicorn thing and it makes sounds. It neighs and sometimes has magic sounds. I have that attached to my cane loop.

Another is a duck key chain light. I obviously can't really use the light, but it quacks when I hit the button. I love ducks so much. When I'm sad sometimes I walk around the house just making it quack.

My dad also bought some uno cards that had Braille. No clue how he managed that, sadly he won't tell me. Mom got me a BUNCH of audiobooks.


Touch is super important to people who can't see. In any degree of sight loss. (It is a spectrum so don't be surprised if your date that night can see color or stuff.) As fun as touching those cute things can be, there are always going to be bad things to touch. If you notice a table at a place is dirty or sticky, warn them. Tell them not to sit or something. Don't fix it for them unless they ask, or if you ask. But warnings are so helpful. It gives us an alert but also allows us to do what we want in that situation. Not just have it done for us.

Touch is also scary for us sometimes. I mean, we could accidentally be touching broken glass and get hurt. But we don't know unless something else gives the fact it's glass away. If you see them hesitate about touching something, that's a good part of why. Even more so in an unfamiliar place. Don't be afraid to ask what they need from you. And phrasing it like that can be super helpful. Not just "here let me do it." But "What can I do for you." They get the freedom to pick.

“What’s wrong with your eye, it looks funny”
“How does bring blind affect you in bed”
Don’t be daft.

Someone who wants to take care of me is a no.

Open minded to what a blind person is and also maybe open mindedness to just how capable we can be.

Don’t use guiding me as an excuse to hold my hand.

Lol and don't say said person doesn't look or act blind. GRR.