Blind and Visually Impaired Community
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Dating with RP (self.Blind)
submitted by ShadowRegalia
I only got my RP diagnosis last year, right when COVID became a worldwid problem. I haven't been on any dates yet, but I am having difficulties with the night. Which is a problem because many dates are in the evening.
How does someone with RP date? Should I tell my date early on that I can't see in the dark? Or have RP?
How does someone with RP date? Should I tell my date early on that I can't see in the dark? Or have RP?
intellectualnerd85 6 points 2y ago
I’ve used dating apps. I’ve been up front with it in the past and choose to let people just get to know me before the so I have a genetic disease and possibly go blind in the future. As soon as dating/looking for someone effects your mental well being take a break
ShadowRegalia [OP] 1 points 2y ago
I have no idea how to bring up habing a genetic disease to a date or when. It definitely seems like it would make getting a second date difficult.
intellectualnerd85 1 points 2y ago
I usually mention it when driving comes up. They’ll ask questions. They might ghost you and although it sucks that’s ok. If I could talk to my younger self I’d recommend getting as one dependent and work on overcoming our limitations. Thus we are seen as a whole person who happens to be different.
HealthyChoice1363 3 points 2y ago
I don't feel any issues in terms of disclosing, if I were you Be upfront and honest early to avoid later heartbreak. Those who judge can pass on by. Those who don't, are keepers.
ShadowRegalia [OP] 2 points 2y ago
i will try, but it is scary. especially when I don't know too much about it myself.
DrillInstructorJan 3 points 2y ago
I have a buddy who had RP that was very fast acting, well, I guess she still has RP in theory, but it's pretty much done all it can do to her now. She's only quite young and would be finishing school around now if the virus wasn't a thing, but I know she is seeing someone who makes her very happy and they're great together. She has very little sight left which makes things simple in a way but it's certainly not something that will keep anyone from happiness.
My approach to meeting new people would apply I think. I can't see anything no matter how much daylight there is. I could see until I was 19 and have very normal body language but people will quickly work out there's something going on. Because of that I like to get to know people on the phone a bit before we meet, then they can figure out I'm a person with thoughts and opinions and normal stuff, then I can drop the bomb on them. But if you can't do that, don't worry, just push on through. As someone else said below, people who can't deal with it aren't worth dealing with.
My approach to meeting new people would apply I think. I can't see anything no matter how much daylight there is. I could see until I was 19 and have very normal body language but people will quickly work out there's something going on. Because of that I like to get to know people on the phone a bit before we meet, then they can figure out I'm a person with thoughts and opinions and normal stuff, then I can drop the bomb on them. But if you can't do that, don't worry, just push on through. As someone else said below, people who can't deal with it aren't worth dealing with.
ShadowRegalia [OP] 1 points 2y ago
I'm not sure how fast my RP is. but also have not seen eye doctors as much as I should. hopefully I would know more soon.
DrillInstructorJan 1 points 2y ago
I think the thing to remember here is that no matter what the news is medically, there is someone out there for everyone and it's really just about making sure you do everything you can to make it possible. No matter what happens in the long term you can massively help yourself out by handling it well. That takes a lot of time and effort that you won't want to spend, but it's so worth it. Please keep posting as there's a lot of very experienced people here who do care.
SugarPie89 3 points 2y ago
There are plenty of things you can do during the day, but I personally disclosed I had bad vision pretty early. Although turns out I wasnt very specific cuz my boyfriend didnt realize how bad it was at first. Had to tell him my exact diagnosis and he looked up RP and read about it. But i met my bf online. I would disclose it early but not necessarily right away unless it has to come out. Like I think the context of me telling my bf I about it was because he asked if I drove I think. So if maybe a guy would suggest having dinner at 8pm, you should explain then that you have bad nght vision cuz you have RP. But you could always opt for breakfast or lunch instead. Or go to a park or anything not at night.
One guy from youtuber who is now married said when he was online datting he didnt put that he was blind in his bio. He wanted them to gett to know him first before. Of course if they would met he would tell them but not before.
One guy from youtuber who is now married said when he was online datting he didnt put that he was blind in his bio. He wanted them to gett to know him first before. Of course if they would met he would tell them but not before.
ShadowRegalia [OP] 1 points 2y ago
i thought about try to do more things earlier in the day. But also worried about places like dark restaurants or movie threaters when they open again.
SugarPie89 1 points 2y ago
I would say to mention it when/if they would suggest doing something at night or at the movies etc. Its really up to you when to disclose but them knowing will allow them to actually accommodate you. :) You have been saying you udont really know how to tell them you have agenetic disorder, but a lot of people have one. Its really no diffferent than saying you have a food allergy, in theory of course. I know its not easy but you could say something like: Hey I know you really wanted to go out to dinner but could we make it lunch? Im visually impaired and cant see well at night.
I think sometthing like that would be good enough. Maybe they would even suggest picking you up so you wouldnt have to find your way by yourself.
I think sometthing like that would be good enough. Maybe they would even suggest picking you up so you wouldnt have to find your way by yourself.
Majestic-Exit-3690 2 points 2y ago
What’s RP?
ShadowRegalia [OP] 2 points 2y ago
retinitis pigmentosa. it is a genetic eye condition
[deleted] 1 points 2y ago
[deleted]
HorkinGreeners 1 points 2y ago
Be upfront and honest early to avoid later heartbreak. Those who judge can pass on by. Those who don't, are keepers.
ShadowRegalia [OP] 1 points 2y ago
i will try. but scary!
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