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Going Away To College After Losing My Peripheral Vision (self.Blind)
submitted by Elaina_Bellingham
Hi all,
Last June I [21F] lost most of my peripheral vision to the point that I’m now legally blind. At the time, I hadn’t been in school since fall of 2018 for other medical issues. I started at community college last fall. Due to the pandemic, all of my classes have been on line so my vision loss hasn’t impacted school in any way for me yet. In this coming fall, I’m transferring to a four year school about an hour from where I now live with my parents. Classes will be in person and I’ll be living in an on campus apartment with someone I don’t know yet. I’m thrilled to be going, but I’m scared to see how my vision loss will affect things. Academically, socially, living wise, etc. Does anyone have advice on any of this for me? I’ll list changes I, and those around me, have had to make and things I’m worried about as a starting point but anything beyond these is welcome too.
1. I use a mobility cane whenever I’m outside my house for safety. People will see it and know I’m visually impaired and I worry about being “the blind girl”or defined by my vision loss.
2. My friends, family, and coworkers know that if they approach me from behind or the side to say something so I know they’re there. I’m easily startled when somebody enters from my blind spots with no warning or comes into my blind spots and starts talking to me. I can tell that to new friends at school but it’s still bound to happen a lot.
3. I get anxious in crowded places or when I know there’s people I should be able to see but can’t. Being in a given situation where that happens repeatedly helps but every time it’s a new place I have to adjust. I feel like I’m going to spend my first weeks on campus always freaked out because I can’t see what’s going on next to me. But even with time there’s always some level of anxiety. I haven’t thought of getting a guide dog because I feel like I have enough vision that it’s not necessary. But maybe I should so they can also help with my anxiety? I have general anxiety disorder and PTSD and animals help with both of those but I don’t have a emotional support animal. Maybe a guide dog could be a service and and emotional support animal?
4. When sitting with a group of people, I always take the spot that allows me to see as many people as possible. I have a chair in the living room that I get first claim to because of this. People around me won’t know that I need to be picky about where I sit. My roommate may not be comfortable setting up the living room in a way that gives me a good spot.
5. My roommate may not be willing to accommodate my needs.
6. People open doors for me all the time now. They’re strangers that I’ll never see again so I just say thank you and move on with it. I don’t want to deal with that every day on campus. I shouldn’t have to explain my vision loss to everyone but it’s awkward to have people assume I need help when I don’t.
7. I can’t use my cane and a shopping cart. How do I get groceries for the week on my own? Should I just have all nonperishables delivered?
Advice on any of these or anything else would be great. Thanks!
Last June I [21F] lost most of my peripheral vision to the point that I’m now legally blind. At the time, I hadn’t been in school since fall of 2018 for other medical issues. I started at community college last fall. Due to the pandemic, all of my classes have been on line so my vision loss hasn’t impacted school in any way for me yet. In this coming fall, I’m transferring to a four year school about an hour from where I now live with my parents. Classes will be in person and I’ll be living in an on campus apartment with someone I don’t know yet. I’m thrilled to be going, but I’m scared to see how my vision loss will affect things. Academically, socially, living wise, etc. Does anyone have advice on any of this for me? I’ll list changes I, and those around me, have had to make and things I’m worried about as a starting point but anything beyond these is welcome too.
1. I use a mobility cane whenever I’m outside my house for safety. People will see it and know I’m visually impaired and I worry about being “the blind girl”or defined by my vision loss.
2. My friends, family, and coworkers know that if they approach me from behind or the side to say something so I know they’re there. I’m easily startled when somebody enters from my blind spots with no warning or comes into my blind spots and starts talking to me. I can tell that to new friends at school but it’s still bound to happen a lot.
3. I get anxious in crowded places or when I know there’s people I should be able to see but can’t. Being in a given situation where that happens repeatedly helps but every time it’s a new place I have to adjust. I feel like I’m going to spend my first weeks on campus always freaked out because I can’t see what’s going on next to me. But even with time there’s always some level of anxiety. I haven’t thought of getting a guide dog because I feel like I have enough vision that it’s not necessary. But maybe I should so they can also help with my anxiety? I have general anxiety disorder and PTSD and animals help with both of those but I don’t have a emotional support animal. Maybe a guide dog could be a service and and emotional support animal?
4. When sitting with a group of people, I always take the spot that allows me to see as many people as possible. I have a chair in the living room that I get first claim to because of this. People around me won’t know that I need to be picky about where I sit. My roommate may not be comfortable setting up the living room in a way that gives me a good spot.
5. My roommate may not be willing to accommodate my needs.
6. People open doors for me all the time now. They’re strangers that I’ll never see again so I just say thank you and move on with it. I don’t want to deal with that every day on campus. I shouldn’t have to explain my vision loss to everyone but it’s awkward to have people assume I need help when I don’t.
7. I can’t use my cane and a shopping cart. How do I get groceries for the week on my own? Should I just have all nonperishables delivered?
Advice on any of these or anything else would be great. Thanks!
TheBlindBookLover 1 points 2y ago
Hi. I would suggest asking your friends and family to say something if they are standing in your blindspot so that you know that they are there.
Elaina_Bellingham [OP] 1 points 2y ago
That was the first adjustment those around me made. I’m more concerned that there will be a lot of people at college who don’t know to do that. I’ll tell new friends but just walking around there will be people I don’t know so they won’t know.
DrillInstructorJan 1 points 2y ago
I went (back) to college six months after going blind and hit loads of this stuff.
Short answer, do not panic. Get a family sized pack of problem solving attitude. A university is honestly a pretty protected environment and as long as you're sane around obvious dangers it will be fine.
Yes, people will see the cane and realise you have sight problems. About the worst you'll usually get is hang on, you can see at least a bit, why do you have the cane. What answer you give is up to you, depends how much you want to get into it. Personally I think you'd rather have people think you have sight problems than think you're a sighted person who just walks into things all the time.
Yes, if you're anything like me, your startle reflex will slowly wind down to the level where you appear to exist in a state of constant zen relaxation and aren't shocked by things you really should be shocked by. Seriously, the reason it happens is probably because people are approaching you from a direction where it seems like you should be able to see them, and they're walking up to you confidently on the assumption you can see them when you can't. The issue here is that even if you ask for them not to do that because it's making you jump, they'll fall into the pit of shame, so make sure you ask super nicely and then change the subject onto something else so they know they're still allowed to be your buddy and talk to you, otherwise they'll run away in fear. This is in general a good approach.
As to animals I think the ideal solution is for you to work out whatever stuff you have, whether or not that takes seeing someone professionally or just taking some time to go through it with some buddies, or whatever works for you. It's probably not ideal to be completely dependent on animals and stuff as there are always places they can't easily go. That said a lot of people have a great working relationship with a guide dog and I wouldn't ever stop you doing that.
The solution to your living room layout issue with the roomie is communication. There is absolutely nothing wrong with making a request and having the discussion. Not having the discussion leads to resentment and misunderstanding. The big problem for me is that I've had these discussions so many times with so many people that it becomes boring and I start using abbreviations people don't understand and really short sentences and suchlike which makes me seem rude and abrupt, when I'm not really. The challenge here is to be nice about it, and keep being nice about it whenever it comes up, which it will, a lot. Happily being nice isn't that hard, you just have to remember to do it. And as I say once you're done discussing it, change the subject and talk about something else or make a joke or whatever so they know you're still on good terms.
Shopping carts are an absolute bitch. The cane isn't long enough to go round it and it wouldn't really work if it was. If you work it out tell me.
Short answer, do not panic. Get a family sized pack of problem solving attitude. A university is honestly a pretty protected environment and as long as you're sane around obvious dangers it will be fine.
Yes, people will see the cane and realise you have sight problems. About the worst you'll usually get is hang on, you can see at least a bit, why do you have the cane. What answer you give is up to you, depends how much you want to get into it. Personally I think you'd rather have people think you have sight problems than think you're a sighted person who just walks into things all the time.
Yes, if you're anything like me, your startle reflex will slowly wind down to the level where you appear to exist in a state of constant zen relaxation and aren't shocked by things you really should be shocked by. Seriously, the reason it happens is probably because people are approaching you from a direction where it seems like you should be able to see them, and they're walking up to you confidently on the assumption you can see them when you can't. The issue here is that even if you ask for them not to do that because it's making you jump, they'll fall into the pit of shame, so make sure you ask super nicely and then change the subject onto something else so they know they're still allowed to be your buddy and talk to you, otherwise they'll run away in fear. This is in general a good approach.
As to animals I think the ideal solution is for you to work out whatever stuff you have, whether or not that takes seeing someone professionally or just taking some time to go through it with some buddies, or whatever works for you. It's probably not ideal to be completely dependent on animals and stuff as there are always places they can't easily go. That said a lot of people have a great working relationship with a guide dog and I wouldn't ever stop you doing that.
The solution to your living room layout issue with the roomie is communication. There is absolutely nothing wrong with making a request and having the discussion. Not having the discussion leads to resentment and misunderstanding. The big problem for me is that I've had these discussions so many times with so many people that it becomes boring and I start using abbreviations people don't understand and really short sentences and suchlike which makes me seem rude and abrupt, when I'm not really. The challenge here is to be nice about it, and keep being nice about it whenever it comes up, which it will, a lot. Happily being nice isn't that hard, you just have to remember to do it. And as I say once you're done discussing it, change the subject and talk about something else or make a joke or whatever so they know you're still on good terms.
Shopping carts are an absolute bitch. The cane isn't long enough to go round it and it wouldn't really work if it was. If you work it out tell me.
Elaina_Bellingham [OP] 1 points 2y ago
This is app very helpful. Thank you!
AchooCashew 1 points 2y ago
I know some (sighted) people actually pull their carts instead of pushing them, and ... I just don't get why, but maybe it would work with a cane if you're determined to use a shopping cart instead of a basket. I personally use baskets ¯\\\_(ツ)\_/¯
BlueRock956 1 points 2y ago
Take an empty see through backpack to the store and use it to put items you are shopping for. Once you pay for the stuff they'd simply go back in and you'll will be able to cary the backpack home.
AchooCashew 1 points 2y ago
Is it a big campus with a lot of people? Chances are you will by no means be the only blind student.
I use a basket while grocery shopping or carry my own reusable bag to put food in as I shop in place of a basket. But depending on the accessibility/distance of stores from your upcoming residence (sometimes an issue for colleges), you may find it easier to deliver. There isn’t really a “should,” just whatever works best.
I wish I could spend time answering more of your questions, but hopefully these helped a little.
I use a basket while grocery shopping or carry my own reusable bag to put food in as I shop in place of a basket. But depending on the accessibility/distance of stores from your upcoming residence (sometimes an issue for colleges), you may find it easier to deliver. There isn’t really a “should,” just whatever works best.
I wish I could spend time answering more of your questions, but hopefully these helped a little.
Elaina_Bellingham [OP] 1 points 2y ago
It’s a little under 2,000 students on 189 acres. I know there will be at least one other blind student but with how small it is, there won’t be many of us.
Do you find one basket has enough room to carry you through at least a week? There’s a non-university grocery store on one corner of campus so I’ll have access to one.
Anything is helpful! Thank you for replying!
Do you find one basket has enough room to carry you through at least a week? There’s a non-university grocery store on one corner of campus so I’ll have access to one.
Anything is helpful! Thank you for replying!
AchooCashew 2 points 2y ago
Definitely! I load that sucker up. The basket acts as a good limit, as well - without being able to drive, about a basketful is what will be possible to carry home in my backpack and/or a big reusable bag.
Elaina_Bellingham [OP] 1 points 2y ago
That’s a good point! I was thinking of getting one of those tall wheeled baskets that hold a few bag but that might have the same issue as a shopping cart.
AchooCashew 2 points 2y ago
I haven't used one of those but I *have* pulled a rolling suitcase behind me while using a cane or guide dog, and that's doable!
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