Im going to a buffet tomorrow any advice?(self.Blind)
submitted by casserole_cat
I don’t really know the last time i went to a buffet i mean i like the idea of it. You know like you pay to get in then you can pig out on a variety of okish food. You pig out trying to eat $30 worth food but unless you really love meat that just isn’t possible.
Anyway I hardly remember the last time i went but i sorta remember my strategy was to say “oooo whats this?” To the person behind the glass in hopes that they will assume im very interested and over explain what it is. (Doesn’t really work when its just like pizza or something) well that didn’t really work out.
Im going with family for my birthday dinner. Im legally blind so sometimes i can tell what stuff is but others I can’t because I obviously cant see the little cards saying what it is.
I remember last time everyone split up as if we were hunting and mustn’t waste any time like cave people. My dad being the one to go grab tons of whatever meats were in low supply for our table.
I should admit it was my idea to go to a buffet because I started daydreaming about never ending pastries. But it just now hit me how terrible i do in buffets. So what should i do? I need advice please
Only1lunatica6 points1y ago
maybe talk to your family about this? mention you need someone to go with you around the buffet and grab food together, so they can tell what stuff is what
casserole_cat [OP]5 points1y ago
Idk I kinda don’t want help because some of my extended family will be there one being my uncle and he’s already made it extremely clear in the past how lowly he thinks of me. Like really he has said some extremely rude things to my face in the past. He’s one of those people who don’t believe in excuses no matter what it is. Like i just turned 17 and him and my aunt (who wont be there) wont shut up about how much I’m failing at life just because i don’t have a job yet (like dude I’m still in my senior year of high school why do they think i have any free time?!)
Idk i know i shouldn’t care about pleasing people that cant be pleased but I really don’t want to give them another thing to talk about me behind my back. I want to seem like perfect in front of my extended family.
Like one time my uncle insisted on reading through my English essay before i turned it in and i made him speechless he could only find 2 things to add in (not even correct!) that i promptly had extremely good reasons as to why I didn’t add those 2 things. I really want to just relive that moment of just doing something perfectly.
ukifrit6 points1y ago
just ignore them and ask a relative for help. You do need it and it will be way more stressful for you to pretend you don't.
Only1lunatica3 points1y ago
then why did you choose it? can you change it?
casserole_cat [OP]3 points1y ago
I wasn’t thinking really when i choose it. It just sounded good and i hadn’t thought about the fact that I’m legally blind in a few weeks because i had no blind moments for a while there.
And its too late to change it i choose it like 3 days ago and we have a time chosen and everyone has been texted.
Only1lunatica6 points1y ago
they are going to make comments no matter what, the point is you have a good time, if it's permanent you're going to have to get used to getting help every now and then, doesn't make you less worthy unlike your uncle who is a twat.
codeplaysleep4 points1y ago
Your uncle's an asshole - ignore him and ask for help if you need it. You don't have to ask family for help if you don't want to. You can always ask the person serving. "Hey, I'm blind, can you give me a hand?"
As to your uncle's opinion, being independent isn't about being able to do everything for yourself. It's about being able to solve your own problems. Sometimes that means doing stuff. Sometimes it means asking other people to lend a hand. If you can't see what's on the buffet, the independent/capable person's solution is to go up and ask the person whose job it is to serve food to people to help you get your food. You're literally utilizing them in the role they're paid for. Someone who lacks independence would sit there and wait for someone to notice and offer food to them.
Just be confident and own it. Your uncle can suck it.
Laser_Lens_44 points1y ago
Do you have a family member that's willing to get food for you? I usually go for the first plate so I know what stuff there is and have someone grab the food for me. Then for the remainder of the meal, I adopt them as my temporary willing servant and stay at the table whenever they go to refill their plate or grab a drink or something.
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In regards to your comments below, see if you can find someone ahead of time to help you out. Frankly, your uncle sounds like an ablist asshole. You need to do whatever you need in order to succeed in life. Usually, we do stuff a bit differently to our sighted counterparts to get round the whole blindness thing. Sometimes that happens to be asking for help and relying on others. It's what Humans do. If he doesn't like it, well too bad. It says a lot about somebody when they get angry at someone else for asking for help. If you need help, you need help. The pain of looking weak in front of others is going to hurt a lot less than the pain of struggling at basic tasks. More often than not, I've found that people are willing and happy to help when they understand why I'm asking and why I need it. Things go smoother, I can do the things I want, and my quality of life has gone up as a result. Everybody needs help from time to time. Some of us just need more than others. That's okay.
officegringo4 points1y ago
I hope it's not too last minute but is there a way that you can invite a friend and ask them to help? It might be better than asking a family member. Also, if you guys follow each other around it would probably just look like 2 friends hanging out not like you'd be getting help.
casserole_cat [OP]2 points1y ago
I only have one friend that would probably be available so last minute. But she gets really awkward and uncomfortable around people she doesn’t really know. So I wouldn’t want to ask that of her.
officegringo2 points1y ago
I think it's worth a shot. If she knows how your family is, maybe she would be willing to help in order to shield you from your families crap. The worst she can say is no! Good luck.
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