Hey. First of all I wanted to say I’m really proud of you for posting this, it takes a lot of bravery to express your vulnerabilities like this. I’m 21F and almost totally blind, I have been all my life. I’m also a creative writer and I know that if I could see, I would also be – similarly to you – a visual learner. I find reading books, especially descriptive ones, can really help bring ideas of the world to life even if you can’t see it anymore. I learned about visual concepts through that. I can’t offer much advice because I don’t know what it’s like to lose my site but I’m here if you ever want to chat or need to call to vent your frustrations. There are ways to get help with this, you aren’t alone. Change, especially on such a fundamental level, is terrifying but I promise you that there are people out there who will be able to guide you, literally and figuratively, through this. Drop me a message if you need a chat! ❤️ XX

Hi, and welcome to r/Blind.

Losing vision is an emotional roller coaster. For me the emotional aspects of going blind have been harder than not being able to see anymore. I wouldn't have guessed that before I went blind. I never imagined the trauma or the grief or the loss of self esteem, I only imagined the fear of walking into something I couldn't see.

There's a whole lot of emotional adjustment involved. It's easy to learn the mechanics of using a white cane, but it's harder to learn how to use it without feeling self conscious. That's just one of many examples. What you're feeling is normal and natural. Almost all of us went through it. It's okay to feel this way.

How do you come to peace with it? Gradually. It doesn't happen overnight. Here's a stream of consciousness list of things that might help -

* Realizing you can adopt a new identity and still be you
* For everything you have to give up, replace it with something else
* Make a blind bucket list. See everything you want to see and do everything you want to do while you still can
* Don't try to be strong all the time. It's okay to feel life is unfair. It's okay to grieve. It's okay to be pissed off at the Universe. It's okay to be afraid. Until I really acknowledged the feelings I didn't want to feel I couldn't move past them
* Stay physically active. Don't underestimate the connection between physical health and mental health. This was especially pertinent to me when I lost my job. I ate because I was bored
* Your creative writing just got one hell of a boost. You're in a unique position because you experience the world in a different way than other writers. Open that up to your readers to give yourself an edge
* Knowledge is power. Know your options. Know where to get a guide dog, a white cane, text-to-speech software, and a talking alarm clock. You might not need them yet but there's peace of mind in knowing they're available

You're not alone. We're here for you. You're also here for us. You might not have thought about it yet but someone is going through the same fear and confusion you are, and in the next few days they'll timidly browse through r/Blind even though they don't feel like they belong yet, and they'll see your post and feel a little less alone, maybe even a little more understood. Your OP is a testament to your humanity. Please understand this. I'm not alone because you're here, feeling as human and as fearful and as confused as I once did. There's solidarity in our suffering, bonding in our shared trauma, and celebration in recognizing the perfection and completeness in our imperfect, incomplete humanity. Know your necessity. Understand the value of your experience to others on the same journey.

Blind lives matter.

Again, welcome to the sub.

I'm not sure where to being without telling you my whole life story, but I'll try and be brief! I'm 33F and I am legally blind (though I do have some vision) in my left eye, and visually impaired in my right. This occurred literally overnight due to a massive brain tumor in my cerebellum.

It's safe to say our situations are not the same, but I think you deserve recognition for putting yourself out here like this and asking for help. I didn't do that. I tried to pretend I was okay, I tried to be like everyone else during my teens, and into my 20's. My anxiety and difference ate me alive, and partway through my 20's I started using prescription opiates. I was a functional addict for almost 8 years, and it was the only way I could smother the self-loathing I felt. It also because the only way I knew how to feel normal, confident, or any type of happiness.

I am over 17 months sober this month. It's been quite the journey, but it all comes back down to trauma. Your fears are valid, and I applaud you for speaking them. Please continue to do so, it's only going to make you stronger. I can also say that the human body is an amazing thing, and although you don't feel as though your hearing is an adequate way to learn I can almost guarantee that you will adapt over time.

I hope someone here has a more relatable answer than me, and I am wishing you all the best 💜

I'm so proud of you. I haven't been able to drive for more years than you have been alive.
I'm going to say some things that are outside of the box.
My Ph D is in mental health. I have two masters in different fields of mental health. My three bachelor's degrees include one in psychology and one in Special Education.
I have a degenerative eye condition. I would lose eyesight and get depressed. Then I would figure out ways to accommodate my new level of disability and then sometime in the future that accommodation wouldn't work and I was back into a depression.
Then one fateful day I took a mushroom journey. I was able to go through all of the stages of grief in a day and never return to a life of depression.
I'm not saying this lightly. I still partake two times a year. They are sacred hours for me. I get to see full colors and I get to see things in focus. I feel like my router has been unplugged and plugged back in.
I understand what I'm saying isn't conventional. If you want you can message me privately. My wife is awesome and supports my journey and helping others.

If you're in the U.S., I believe every state has a commission for the blind. That's a contact point for services and programs. They teach you ordinary skills needed for living, how to navigate with a cane, how to use technology to read computer screens and other print, how to look for a job, etc. Some programs for people who are blind offer telesupport group therapy.

First, a glaucoma diagnosis doesn't necessarily mean you're going blind. I have a severe case of congenital glaucoma, meaning I was born with it, and despite the severity of my condition my vision remained stable for 29 years. I had experimental surgeries in the early to mid 80s that are standard glaucoma procedures now, and after that it was just a matter of following prescriptions religiously. One thing you must understand is that physicians have a plethora of tools at their disposal to tackle glaucoma these days ranging from medication to more heavy tools like shunts and laser surgeries, so until you have exhausted all of these possibilities, there's no reason to panic.

Second, many people who go blind don't end up in complete darkness. I'm totally blind now, can't even perceive light anymore because I stopped caring about my residual vision and ditched medication once I lost the ability to read, but my brain fills the void with very blurry hallucinations as if I was actually seeing the real world around me.

Third, I was also very reliant on vision despite having been visually impaired my own life, and I too thought I wouldn't be able to adapt to a world where I would have to rely on hearing as my primary sense, but eventually it happened, and while it took much longer than it should for me to adapt, with time screen-readers and speech synthesizers became normal in my life as I realized that things would be much better if I just accepted blindness than if I didn't.

For background I was a year younger than you and I was training to be a TV camera operator, so I guess there's some comparison there. I don't know how bad your situation will get how quickly, and I know there are treatments for glaucoma, so I'll base this on my situation which is sort of a worst case scenario.

You don't have to like it, you have to find a way to not like it that you can live with. I know that sounds like playing with words but hear me out. Often people are presented with hugely successful blind people who seem to not really have a problem with it. Those people often seem to love every second of it and it can seem like you have to somehow start loving being blind, and that seems impossible.

Yes, it is impossible. Not being able to see is horrible, but the point is it doesn't utterly destroy my life and ruin everything. The way I achieve that is by forcing myself at metaphorical gun point to do absolutely as much as I can, which requires a ton of extra work and taking risks. It is the second job that I hate, never gives me a day off, and I can never quit, but I will do it. So in the end what I hate is being forced to do a second job that I don't like, but that I can handle.

Of course vegetating on the couch doing nothing is easier in the short term but you will hate everyone and everything. I guess this is actually bad news, I'm telling you that you will have to work your hindquarters off to make life okay, but maybe some of that touches on what's going through your head.

A good start is developing your other senses