Blind and Visually Impaired Community
↑
8
↓
Need some advice to help a friend. (self.Blind)
submitted by AKBillsDude
I have a friend who, due to Lyme disease, lost his vision years ago. He progressively got worse and worse until he found a treatment that seemed to work for him. I'm not going to go into details because it's not relevant. Recently his vision has been getting worse, combined with some other horrible things, he was in a dark place for a while. He became very stagnant, which isn't like him. Then his girlfriend, and mother of his kid, decided she didn't want to be in a relationship anymore.
After that he has started taking over his life. Doing laundry, changing light bulbs, taking care of his finances... He is starting to get back in the swing of things.
I'm here because I cannot imagine the world and how hard it is to get back on your feet without having your eyesight. I need some ideas for him to stay motivated, and give himself challenges to better his state of mind and his quality of life. This man is like a brother to me. I might not be there physically for him, I live about 2000 miles away, but I want to support him and be there in any way possible. Thanks for your time.
After that he has started taking over his life. Doing laundry, changing light bulbs, taking care of his finances... He is starting to get back in the swing of things.
I'm here because I cannot imagine the world and how hard it is to get back on your feet without having your eyesight. I need some ideas for him to stay motivated, and give himself challenges to better his state of mind and his quality of life. This man is like a brother to me. I might not be there physically for him, I live about 2000 miles away, but I want to support him and be there in any way possible. Thanks for your time.
vwlsmssng 7 points 1y ago
Tell him to join Reddit and go to the r/blind sub. I hear there are some really friendly and helpful people there. Sometimes people come here just to have a rant, usually justifiable, and they get a fair hearing.
B-dub31 6 points 1y ago
As an adult, I lost a great deal of my vision suddenly after a medical emergency, so I absolutely understand what your friend is going through and sympathize with him. If he hadn't seen a low vision specialist yet, he should definitely get a referral. They helped me so much there by introducing me to accessible equipment and technologies. It really made me hopeful that I could be independent as much as possible. And in hindsight, I should have sought mental health support. Losing my vision was a grieving process not unlike a tragedy like losing a loved one. Because I didn't deal with it that way, it really took me about two years to get my mind on straight again and be able to move ahead. Thank you for being a good friend to him in a dark time and best wishes to you both.
bradley22 5 points 1y ago
My best advice would be talk to him, ask him what kind of things he wants to do.
grackthecowbell 7 points 1y ago
Staying social is huge! Vision changes can seem very isolating.
My friends that moved to a different state have a monthly movie night with me. This is a personal preference and may not work with your friend. We always pick movies/shows with good audio description so I'm included.
My friends that moved to a different state have a monthly movie night with me. This is a personal preference and may not work with your friend. We always pick movies/shows with good audio description so I'm included.
bradley22 3 points 1y ago
Sounds great!
AKBillsDude [OP] 4 points 1y ago
I definitely have talked to him and will continue to talk to him. He's just having a hard time getting motivation and getting out of this rut. I like the simple suggestion of just ask him of things he wants to do. I have problems coming up with ideas, but I can build off of other people's ideas. When we were kids he struggled with self identity. He eventually discovered himself and really thrived as a person. These last few years after his vision got really bad he fell back into a place where he doesn't know what to do or really have drive to do anything. That fueled by depression really destroyed him. I understand his girlfriend's reasons for leaving... That's a whole other story though. My buddy needs something to pick him up and motivate him. And me talking to him about his feelings doesn't feel like I am helping him enough, I know it helps, but I can't come up with anything to motivate him besides "keep going, you're doing great." I want to do better for him
bradley22 3 points 1y ago
Yeah, I get that. My friend and I are both blind and we go to restaurants a lot, we do a bit more than that sometimes but more often than not, we’re at a restaurant.
I’m not sure where you live, I’m in the UK, but in the US there is quite a few places for the Blind to learn skills and things, maybe he can go there, it’s quite a bit expensive though.
I’m not sure where you live, I’m in the UK, but in the US there is quite a few places for the Blind to learn skills and things, maybe he can go there, it’s quite a bit expensive though.
AKBillsDude [OP] 3 points 1y ago
I live in Alaska now, and he lives in Minnesota. About 3000 miles if you drive. He's limited for funds, but I can look for stuff in his area and set it up for him if it's viable for him.
TechnicalPragmatist 6 points 1y ago
Signing him up with the state rehabilitation may be useful. They can provide services and funds for third party services. He may be able to get some help through there. They can help him find jobs get training, or go back to school to train or study up for a field or job.
Also training may be useful lighthouse is in every state. Blind inc is in minnesota and vocational rehabilitation may be able to help fund it. Otherwise trainers can come to the house and train on independent living skills.
Also training may be useful lighthouse is in every state. Blind inc is in minnesota and vocational rehabilitation may be able to help fund it. Otherwise trainers can come to the house and train on independent living skills.
bradley22 4 points 1y ago
You might be able to get in contact with lighthouse for the blind, although I’m not sure what states they’re in. I think they help blind people but I’m not entirely sure with what.
Sewn27 1 points 1y ago
Me again. I live in Texas and there are many things I have learned out there for the extremely low vision and blind. He should call 211 in his state to learn about these things from a live operator. He should also Do a Google search for things in his state. There is an organization called: “leader for the blind”, In Michigan that if he qualifies will provide him with O&M help, and in another program a leading dog. At no cost. I wish you both the best.
This nonprofit website is run by volunteers.
Please contribute if you can. Thank you!
Our mission is to provide everyone with access to large-
scale community websites for the good of humanity.
Without ads, without tracking, without greed.
scale community websites for the good of humanity.
Without ads, without tracking, without greed.
©2023 HumbleCat Inc • HumbleCat is a 501(c)3 nonprofit based in Michigan, USA.