Blind and Visually Impaired Community
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cleaning questions from a partner (self.Blind)
submitted by Sea_Bear5041
Hi,
I am the partner of a person with visual impairment and am at a bit of a loss with regards to cleaning as a visually impaired person and was hoping to get some insight or advice.
My partner insists on doing the cleaning themselves but it gets quite dirty often, and they refuse to let me help or hire a cleaning service. They're not in imminent danger, but it's just not healthy how long it goes without a proper clean, in my opinion, and I'm definitely not a clean freak.
I'm confused because I saw a lot of advice on how to clean but i see other people hire cleaning services.
Am I being unreasonable? I'm not clear how much of this has to do with her disability and cleaning being difficult and what is just her own choices.
Thanks
I am the partner of a person with visual impairment and am at a bit of a loss with regards to cleaning as a visually impaired person and was hoping to get some insight or advice.
My partner insists on doing the cleaning themselves but it gets quite dirty often, and they refuse to let me help or hire a cleaning service. They're not in imminent danger, but it's just not healthy how long it goes without a proper clean, in my opinion, and I'm definitely not a clean freak.
I'm confused because I saw a lot of advice on how to clean but i see other people hire cleaning services.
Am I being unreasonable? I'm not clear how much of this has to do with her disability and cleaning being difficult and what is just her own choices.
Thanks
Coloratura1987 8 points 1y ago
First, I'm a blind person who's lived on my own and with roommates for a number of years. I cook, clean, and work independently, just as anyone else, and have taught other blind students to do the same.
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But before I can give you any insight, I have a few clarifying questions.
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First, what kind of mess are we talking about? Dirty toilets? Garbage everywhere? Spoiled food?
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Next, what kind of cleaning do they do? What does their process literally look like?
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Lastly, can you give me a bit more context about your conversation with her around cleaning? Has she received adequate training on how to do these things efficiently and effectively?
​
But before I can give you any insight, I have a few clarifying questions.
​
First, what kind of mess are we talking about? Dirty toilets? Garbage everywhere? Spoiled food?
​
Next, what kind of cleaning do they do? What does their process literally look like?
​
Lastly, can you give me a bit more context about your conversation with her around cleaning? Has she received adequate training on how to do these things efficiently and effectively?
r_1235 2 points 1y ago
I would be interested in getting some tips and answers about cleaning dirty toylets and dishes from you or anyone else who has good experience and knowhow about it. Also, washing clothes, I don't have an accessible washing machine, don't know how it works. Also, dust, OMG, I have a big problem with dust. How do you combat that? do you just do wiping tables and windows on regular bases? Isn't there a more easy solution?
Coloratura1987 1 points 1y ago
So I could describe it, but I’m thinking it may be best demonstrated via something like a Zoom call. That way, you could actually see me doing it, if you have some residual vision.
ColonelKepler 1 points 1y ago
Just chiming in here to say I'd also be really interested in a write-up or something, if you ever feel like doing that (totally blind, so visual demonstration won't work for me). I'm told I'm pretty clean, and have never really had problems with roommates, but I feel like there are a lot of "learn-by-observation" things that I've just never picked up, or done so poorly, because I obviously can't do that the way someone with vision would.
Coloratura1987 1 points 1y ago
I’d be happy to describe things on Zoom, too, so it wouldn't be just a visual thing.
r_1235 1 points 1y ago
I do have little bit of usable vision, but, don't think I can see anything through a zoom call. Although, getting on a zoom call or whatever call and explaining me the solutions might be very useful to me.
Thank you!
Thank you!
Sea_Bear5041 [OP] 1 points 9m ago
Hi. Thanks to everyone for responding. Sorry it’s been so long. I was having trouble with the app and didn’t know how to get back.
Someone wrote a very thoughtful response about how people with disabilities or anyone really sometimes don’t want help. And I have to respect her choices which was helpful so I let it go.
The main issue is dust and vacuuming. I have asthma so I thought we might have to break up because I couldn’t breathe at her place. I thought vacuuming was a really dumb reason to break up with someone you love. It was very bad in the spring but it’s been better lately as the pets aren’t shedding.
It’s helpful to hear the perspective of other people with visual impairment. I think perhaps cleaning is just not a huge priority for her just like it isn’t for all kinds of people. It’s liveable but I thought maybe she needed help or something and I understand now that it’s just what she is comfortable with.
Take care,
Seabear
Someone wrote a very thoughtful response about how people with disabilities or anyone really sometimes don’t want help. And I have to respect her choices which was helpful so I let it go.
The main issue is dust and vacuuming. I have asthma so I thought we might have to break up because I couldn’t breathe at her place. I thought vacuuming was a really dumb reason to break up with someone you love. It was very bad in the spring but it’s been better lately as the pets aren’t shedding.
It’s helpful to hear the perspective of other people with visual impairment. I think perhaps cleaning is just not a huge priority for her just like it isn’t for all kinds of people. It’s liveable but I thought maybe she needed help or something and I understand now that it’s just what she is comfortable with.
Take care,
Seabear
carolineecouture 7 points 1y ago
How clean is clean is something all couples have to deal with, VI or not. I'd have a discussion about what you both can tolerate.
Many people have disagreements about hiring cleaners for all sorts of reasons, what are theirs? Can you come to terms about that?
Good luck!
Many people have disagreements about hiring cleaners for all sorts of reasons, what are theirs? Can you come to terms about that?
Good luck!
heitorrsa 4 points 1y ago
Talk to the person. Maybe she doesn't know how dirty it is getting, and maybe she simply wants to take care of her own life on her own terms.
But in the end, the best is: talk.
But in the end, the best is: talk.
TechnicalPragmatist 3 points 1y ago
Have you expressed how dirty the place is before, even if it’s gently.
Hey, look, do you know your place kind of doesn’t look all that clean right?
Or something even more gentle but let them know.
And say would you mind if we clean it together or let me help you clean up?
I mean if she knows and then refuses to let you that’s probably unreasonable and she is stubborn or has some ego issues or just want it her way and sticks to them unnecessarily rigidly.
I like my comfort and my way to but if people legitly point out how dirty it is in a polite fashion, I don’t think I’d deny it.
Hey, look, do you know your place kind of doesn’t look all that clean right?
Or something even more gentle but let them know.
And say would you mind if we clean it together or let me help you clean up?
I mean if she knows and then refuses to let you that’s probably unreasonable and she is stubborn or has some ego issues or just want it her way and sticks to them unnecessarily rigidly.
I like my comfort and my way to but if people legitly point out how dirty it is in a polite fashion, I don’t think I’d deny it.
Mamamagpie 2 points 1y ago
What sort of dirty is it? Dust? Dirt on the floor? Dirty dishes?
Simply_Limeade 1 points 1y ago
You could maybe ninja clean things. You know, like quickly before they can tell. Or come up with an excuse as to why you are cleaning, like it helps you think or something. Or even just ask why they don't want help and explain your thoughts on the matter. Communication goes a long way.
EyesR4Nerds 4 points 1y ago
Communication is always helpful.
But to me, ninja cleaning is the exact opposite. Let’s not be deceptive to save someone’s feelings when you could talk instead?
But to me, ninja cleaning is the exact opposite. Let’s not be deceptive to save someone’s feelings when you could talk instead?
Simply_Limeade 2 points 1y ago
That's why I said communication goes a long way. But who am I to judge how someone may want to go about a thing?
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