Before my little niece was born, I had asked my sister, if I could help feed, bathe etc..... She said no, but I thought that would change when baby came along when baby was first born, I had pretty bad sciaticca, so couldn't hold baby for long periods, but that didn't mean I wanted to be excluded altogether. I don't remember when or how exactly, but at some point I was actually told by my sister, that I was never to pick the baby up, and I have never been allowed either hold the baby without supervision, or watch the baby or anything like that. My sister actually used my blindness as the reason I was never to pick the baby up, I was more than devostated by this. Also, watching everyone else pick her up, sooth her when she was upset etc, as I lived at home when she was first born, thanmfully don't now. Just wondering, has anything similar happened to anyone else? Also, my mum sided with her, and agreed that I shouldn't pick baby up because I can't see.... Curious to get others thoughts on this. specially people blind from birth like myself, but all input welcome
CosmicBunny976 points1y ago
There's blind parents who are more than capable of taking care of their children. Maybe show your mum and sister some examples and show them that, yes you can be trusted with your baby niece?
DHamlinMusic5 points1y ago
Yeah was going to say, I myself have a 10 month old daughter, she’s also 8.5 months cause was 6.5 weeks premature, and I do just fine, feeding, changing, watching, etc.
pisces0387 [OP]1 points1y ago
no point. I tried pointing that out when it happened.
r_12352 points1y ago
This really made me feel very sad. To think that a sister would behave like this to a brother, that too, a mother.
If your sister or any sighted person is reading this, let it be known, that we are more then capable of taking care of children. I've taught a bunch of kids in a classroom like situation, I've played with my little cousins and I love doing so. There were some hickups, but, nothing life threatening. My friend is a blind mother, and she is doing great.
TechnicalPragmatist2 points1y ago
Yes unfortunately and I am very upset about it. I have an asian family and I am asian and I get this a lot. They don’t only think I am not capable but they think I am no use too. I am just a child just a disabled person. I think I’ve only held one family member’s baby before. And it was only when I was sitting down. With close supervision.
I remember when everyone else around me as a teen got to babysit and I didn’t. I’ve never really babysat anyone. The one time I did for middle school class one of the parents made sure they were home.
I always wanted to just for the experience. But never got a chance.
Family never encouraged their children to be anywhere near me or to listen to me even though I was a second cousin that was 15 years older at least. Maybe 10 at the least. No one cared. Sometimes much more older but yeah.
Recently I got a chance to sort of do it the mother was around but seemed to trust me around her kid. She’s not a baby but even little kids. She wasn’t asian, she’s either latino or wite I think. We were at a bible study and after it I went up to the kid to see if she had had food. I hung out with the 5 year old and her mother. I think it was her bedtime but they were still waiting on the others for a ride home. This woman is sighted but I guess she carpooled. I found the 5 year old on the couch and sat with her while she was falling asleep.
Do I think I am the best person with kids, no far from it, probably don’t have the patience and temperament, but yeah, at least I had a go.
pisces0387 [OP]1 points1y ago
same experiences, never got to babysit or anything like that. .... It's so hard when you come to terms with the fact they just think you are not capable :( sorry that happened to you
TechnicalPragmatist2 points1y ago
Yeah, definitely not fun so I just stay away. One of my second cousins graduated from high school today. I couldn’t go because I knew how they’d treat me and the second cousins would have a bad idea of me because of how family treats me like a kid. No one else does.
I never go to family stuff. I can’t. I want to meet the second cousins but not in that environment. I want to see who they are etc… but yeah.
Yeah, it’s true though.
pisces0387 [OP]1 points1y ago
do you have any chance of living on your own?
TechnicalPragmatist1 points1y ago
Maybe some day but I currently have no money and this state is also very expensive. I guess I could try section 8. But I wouldn’t be left with much.
Rhymershouse2 points1y ago
Ugh! How ignorant! I’ve got a one-year-old. I take care of him during the day while my wife works.
DHamlinMusic1 points1y ago
Yeah as I said I have a daughter just a bit under one, same deal once the fiance gets back to work, but I watch her on my own plenty. People just suck at times, a lot of the time actually thinking about it, but getting that from family is just shitty.
codeplaysleep2 points1y ago
Ugh, I'm sorry. That's awful and very un-informed of them.
My son turns 20 on Sunday and I have thus far managed to not kill, maim, or otherwise harm him by being blind.
bradley220 points1y ago
I’ve been blind from birth, I’ve held too maybe three babies in my lifetime, I can kind of understand your sister doesn’t want you to drop the baby, but you can totally hold it if she shows you how to.
Our mission is to provide everyone with access to large- scale community websites for the good of humanity. Without ads, without tracking, without greed.