I went blind when super young so it’s been more of a “norm” for me. My mom with cataracts however… She was frequently panicking and yelling often, which lead to an awful childhood. However, I understand she was distressed so eh. Shrugs.

Number one is patience and second is professional resources. Molly Burke is a younger fuller blind YouTuber but she has fantastic tips!

Supportive housing isn’t a shame and shouldn’t be one. If you are helping her, please apply for a caregivers stipend!!

The fact that you are here right now asking strangers for help is a huge step. It means you can be her mental support. I know it’s scary but the best thing is having someone to help you that doesn’t see you as a burden, because honestly many people do. So the fact that she has someone who cares so deeply is the best thing anyone could give her. Be there for her listen to her struggles her fears. And try to meet some of these struggles head on with her. O&m can help her navigate the streets, but one thing it can’t do is give her life skills. Help her learn to cook on her own. This isn’t an impossible feat. She can learn to cook without vision I have a nearly blind friend who is a professional chef. He makes amazing meals. You can get measuring cups that are different colors so she can tell them apart I actually have found cooking utensils such as measuring cups and spoons that have raised numbers on them so you can feel if it’s a cup or a half. You also can get braille stickers to put on the microwave or laundry machines to help with I also have had them put on the stove when I was first learning to cook. I suggest taking knives slowly you can feel where the blade is and cut but it’s hard to get the hang of and takes practice. I know it can be difficult and she may fail a thousand times but if she wants to remain independent the best time to start trying to transition to her new life is right now. Do as much as she can while she still has vision. Believe me she will struggle. I failed a lot at doing simple tasks, putting on makeup, doing my hair cooking meals, I failed and I tried again I failed and I tried again and I failed again. But I never gave up and at the end of the day I eventually learned to do things independently. It will look much different than her normal life before but if she wants to be independent I promise you she can be. Being visually impaired is hard and frustrating but if you have people who love and support you and have A LOT of patience. She can get through this. Don’t stop encouraging her, give her the space to screw up and not lose her dignity. This too is just a hurdle and you can get over it and never look back. It’s possible with enough determination. My inbox is always open if you have any specific questions I would be more than happy to help in anyway I can. Also if you would like to check it out I have a YouTube channel all about living with low vision you can check out if you like.Hope I helped some. I wish you and your mum all the best! You both got this! Good luck! $1

I think part of the answer will be time. It takes time to grieve a loss, and if she is still slowly losing sight, the grief may be prolonged.
Another thing that can help is increasing positive life events and successes. Tactfully point out any improvements or successes you see as she learns new skills, no matter how minor.
It may help to make a priority list with her of what things in life are most important to her. i never liked cooking, but mobility in the outdoor world is very high priority for me. I focus most of my spare energy outside of work on outdoor activities and learning to navigate new environments.
I also love assimilating new ideas. Getting a subscription to a library for the blind has given me access to tons of free audiobooks on an app and now I can listen to them faster than I was ever able to read with my eyes. (Playback devices are also available for free through these services but I prefer my tablet.)
Having reading and outdoor mobility at the least keeps me from feeling as stressed about the things that I have less time to work on and don’t care about as much.

If there is something that she loves that she is having to give up (or dramatically change the way she does it) be prepared to help her grieve by listening without judgement or advice and give her space to take her time. I used to absolutely love sight-reading music on the piano, and when I lost the ability to see well enough to do that, I almost couldn’t look at a piano without immense emotional pain. That lasted for a couple years. It may seem silly since I also can improvise and write my own music, but losing sight-reading felt like whole worlds of stress-relief and mental growth were now closed to me. Improvising, playing by ear, and writing music does not make up for that loss at all, however, after grieving for a couple years, these alternatives began to feel like more positive stress reliefs instead of just making me sad about what I’d lost, like they had at first.

Perhaps there is some hobby or activity she is grieving in particular. It might take time and mourning before the alternative “blind” version of the activity seems attractive, and that might come in fits and starts with two steps forward and one back.
Just remember that as humans, we are highly adaptable and with time and the love and support of others, our losses stop taking a constant center-stage.

Another thing that sometimes can help is to take her side, even in irrational moments. For example, if she is getting mad at her computer because the magnification software is crashing a program and she wants to vent about how thoughtless and useless the makers of the program are, just take her side and say “Yeah, you’re right, why can’t they get their act together.” Don’t just say “Well, they must just be having trouble keeping up with the latest Windows update” or something like that. If it doesn’t hurt anything, try not to argue against her frustrations, but instead, when it’s possible and doesn’t cause you any harm or problem, just validate and agree. If you can see a simple solution, read the situation and possibly wait for emotions to cool off before offering it. Maybe wait a couple days.
Sometimes frustrations can be turned to positive action, but only if the validation is there. When I complain to my friends that I wish the city would repaint the lines on the walking paths near me, it really helps when they just agree instead of saying something like that I’m the only low vision person using the path or that the city budget is low. I prefer when they say “yeah, fresh lines would help everyone! Let’s write the council!”

I grew up with a mother who was slowly losing sight. She was the type to keep her emotions pretty private though, so I didn’t see very many of the rough edges. I did enjoy doing things like leading her and reading mail for her and if she needed help with something, (like picking out the right cans for dinner), I was quick to hop to it. It sounds like you are already doing all that. My sense is that over time, your mum will start to experience for herself the joy of slowly regaining independence. It’s easy as a person losing my sight to simply start delegating activities to people who can do them more easily than me, but I’m starting to see that clawing back for the things I used to do alone can make me feel successful and competent. That means that things like shopping and cooking are next on my list to conquer even though they are lower priority for me. It has helped to start with the things I care about most and then move on down the list.