I was too scared to say anything while at work today (I wrote this on my break because something had JUST happened) because I didn’t know if I would get in trouble. But I think I’m going to bring something up next time I am there.

Same here. Touchy by nature but I always keep it at the shoulder level and ask if you want a hug. I would definitely want a touch averse coworker to say something. Very important in our tight space

I would say to talk to the person who is doing the touching. You don't need to tell superiors unless it doesn't stop.

I do not like people touching me at all but I know it's a 'me' thing and some people are literally just friendly. I usually ask them to not touch me in a jokingly rude way, or I move away from their hands. This doesn't work for everyone of course but it does for me. I just tend to be very straight forward about it 'hey, I don't really like hugs. Please do not hug me. Your touch repulses me'. Like obviously I'm kidding about feeling repulsed but it's my way of letting people know that I don't like being touched.

even without the PTSD that’s definitely not cool behavior and very icky
you should definitely talk to your SM about that

I am also trying to work through PTSD from sexual assault problems.. it’s really tough for me. And I end up being completely silent in the moment because first I have like a horrible flashback response, and then it’s followed by me being so angry that I can’t say anything out of fear of like freaking out.

That's absolutely nasty. You should talk to your SM about it ... that's so not okay.

How exactly did that happen? Like, how was it handled “quietly”. I’m trying to not make a big deal about it but I don’t know how to.

Right! And all I can ever think is just, DO NOT TOUCH ME. And I can’t say it out loud because it will NOT be in a nice tone. I can’t handle it. Just don’t touch me. Idk why that’s such a fucking concept.

I think I’m scared of it becoming this big deal. I just don’t want it to be something that’s brought up all the time. I’m trying to figure out a way to get it resolved easily.

You need to go to your manager and then their manager and then corporate. This is not okay, and is harrassment at this point because they know they are touching you without your consent.

It depends. Some people tap on the shoulder to not bump into people and that’s okay. But the whole back thing really doesn’t sit well with me but that’s just me. I usually make sure to say behind when passing.

I don’t think so. I do this all the time. Or I’ll put a hand on their arm to stop them from crashing back into me while I say “behind” for them to hear me.

Not at all. I do the same thing! But you can tell when it makes other uncomfortable so just be mindful 😊

It is not creepy but it will be very obvious to notice when people don't like even casual touches. Like me.

I had a co-worker who did this to me a handful of times before stopping because I kept flinching and turning around when they touched me. Nothing violent has happened in my past, I just hate touch that much.

One thing I’ve learned to do is hover my hand behind their shoulder while I’m walking behind them (also saying “I’m right behind you”). So that way if they DO move, they’ll feel my hand on their shoulder and stay put. But I’m not initiating any more contact than absolutely necessary.

See like, I’m not ALWAYS against it. I give high fives sometimes. And hugs too sometimes. But it’s different when I’m consenting. Thankfully no one has just ran up and hugged me without there being that moment where we are both clearly agreeing to it in a long time.

But the shoulder/back rubs and stuff like that just makes me so uncomfortable. Or when people like move me, like just putting their hands on my shoulders and guiding me along.

I have ptsd from trauma from sexual assaults and physically abusive past relationships, so someone touching me or someone using force toward me like that really messes me up.

I dunno how to go about it without it being a big deal, and I don’t want to offend anybody either.

As someone that’s usually the hugger and stuff, how would I make sure to not offend you? I also have severe anxiety so it’s all just a bundle of nonsense in my head.

So I won’t lie, it REALLY bothered me at first. Someone from a different store came to ours for about a month when we lost an SSV, and he kind of started that habit in our store because I guess that’s how they communicate that they’re moving by at his other store. And everyone started doing it because he did.

I am a mental MESS, so unfortunately I didn’t take it well at all for a long time. I have had really bad anxiety all my life, and now on top of added anxiety/ptsd from things that happened to me, it just took a really long time for me to accept it. I really don’t like unwarranted touching, especially when I’m not expecting it.

But I’ve kind of adjusted. I guess in a way I just gave in, because at least the shoulder tap is less invasive than a back touch or other things like that.

I also often feel bad, because I know that it’s a me thing and that it isn’t a big deal to other people. I try really hard not to over react because I sometimes feel like I’m being stupid. I know people don’t.. they don’t mean it in the way that my brain instinctually takes it. And I don’t want to make other people feel bad for something that shouldn’t be a big deal. I just can’t help it either. So I’m just stuck in this weird place. I can’t differentiate between the ones that shouldn’t be a big deal and the ones that are definitely crossing a line.

Manager was one of the incidents. I’m speaking strictly coworkers. Our Customers know better than I just touch people.