Starbucks Baristas: The daily grind
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Starbucks doesnt actually care about your mental health its all BS (self.starbucksbaristas)
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miniinovaa 16 points 3y ago
I mean not to diminish how you’re feeling, but if every female around your age doesn’t like you... just maybe it’s you?
I don’t know you or your store so I can’t tell you why or if that’s true but as some one who also has mental health issues and I go to therapy to learn how to cope with people, I’ve learned not to take things personal and when my behavior is in the wrong which is hard to see sometimes. I’m sorry you’re unhappy and feel like you’re being treated unfairly and I hope things improve for you
I don’t know you or your store so I can’t tell you why or if that’s true but as some one who also has mental health issues and I go to therapy to learn how to cope with people, I’ve learned not to take things personal and when my behavior is in the wrong which is hard to see sometimes. I’m sorry you’re unhappy and feel like you’re being treated unfairly and I hope things improve for you
pleasesurpriseme 12 points 3y ago
Yeah, the rest of the post is understandable and I hope OP finds something that works out for her because things don’t sound like they’re a good fit... but the common denominator is her.
I know a few women who all say they don’t get along with “females” and they all have the same vibe. They usually mention it too, in a certain way. It’s off putting as heck. I don’t trust dudes who call women females and I trust women who use that term even less- it’s very dehumanizing.
I know a few women who all say they don’t get along with “females” and they all have the same vibe. They usually mention it too, in a certain way. It’s off putting as heck. I don’t trust dudes who call women females and I trust women who use that term even less- it’s very dehumanizing.
dodofishman 6 points 3y ago
Yeah I'm sorry OP is having a hard time but I'm a woman and I love my fellow lady coworkers. I'm really shy and have bad anxiety related to trust/abandonment so I totally understand where OP's coming from, some work environments can be cliquey and it can feel lonely until people get to know you. That takes a few months for me till I start feeling comfortable around new people. Internalized misogyny is common as well though. I wish OP well!!!
miniinovaa 3 points 3y ago
Yeah, exactly.
the only other thing I disagree with is the manager not answering, they have lives too, but that’s probably like the icing on top of the cake situation.
the only other thing I disagree with is the manager not answering, they have lives too, but that’s probably like the icing on top of the cake situation.
Reila01 -6 points 3y ago
So you are telling me that not responding to my message about my availability update before its too late to change it and not responding 5 hours after i sent it is understandable?
miniinovaa 5 points 3y ago
Yes. They have a life, they aren’t going to stop everything they’re doing to cater to your needs. Also you change it online, you don’t need to text your manager.
pleasesurpriseme 2 points 3y ago
You can change your own availability. I text my sm sometimes but never expect a response until I see her in person. Technically I don’t think we’re even supposed to text off the clock- time worked should be time paid.
Reila01 -2 points 3y ago
I knew that if i didnt tell the stories of instances ive been disrespected by these women i would have people in the comments misunderstanding everything. But i know very well what i have experienced and im not crazy or overreacting to anything. I know the behavior these people has hasnt only been affecting me in the store. I know im not doing anything to these women. I just for some reason been some kind of easy target even if i try to stay away from trouble. We live in a day in age where people still judge you from appearance.
pleasesurpriseme 5 points 3y ago
I have no idea what your appearance has to do with you calling women “females” and your inability to get on with any women, ever, apparently.
No one is saying you’re crazy or over reacting, just that the things you’re saying have connotations you might not realize. I’m not at all saying you aren’t getting on with your coworkers- just that from the tone and words here you might get an idea why.
No one is saying you’re crazy or over reacting, just that the things you’re saying have connotations you might not realize. I’m not at all saying you aren’t getting on with your coworkers- just that from the tone and words here you might get an idea why.
Reila01 -6 points 3y ago
Gee well i wonder what i could have possibly done for these women at my job to hate me so much since i literally just come to work and go home and i rarely talk. And im literally not the only woman in the entire store that is really quiet. So how am o the problem?? I never attacked them, i never disrespected them or been rude to them when i do talk to them. So i dont understand what i am 'doing'.
[deleted] [OP] 8 points 3y ago
[deleted]
Reila01 1 points 3y ago
This is what im talking about. We are discussing this online. I do make attempts to talk to people and communicate with them. Its the way they respond to me that causes me to shut down and not bother talking. Like i said im literally not the only silent girl in the whole store. I talk to everyone but so many have given me cold shoulders and i dont believe that i am being rude because i talk to everyone the same way and the men in the store dont respond to me the same way the women do. Im nice to everyone i speak to. I know very well what it means to be rude
Mariiriini 2 points 3y ago
What do you mean, this is what you're talking about?
[deleted] [OP] 6 points 3y ago
[deleted]
Reila01 1 points 3y ago
And also i do have good relationships with other females in the store but im generally speaking that in most work environments ive only ever been treated bad by more of my female coworkers than anyone else. Just because i am more introverted than others shouldn't be a valid excuse to be disliked and treated bad. I literally only got eye rolls when i was new to my starbucks and all i would do was nervously introduce myself to people.
Reila01 0 points 3y ago
If you actually read my post you wouldve seen that i mentioned i have gone to therapy before.
Mariiriini 3 points 3y ago
It's not a one and done hun. I've been working on and continue to work on my mental health for over 8 years. I also lived in an abusive household, you can't expect to have everything be fixed while living in the environment that was a likely a contributing factor.
miniinovaa 2 points 3y ago
Therapy isn’t a one time fix all treatment. Sometimes people have to go for their entire life, sometimes not. I’m not saying anything on what you need to do, but something isn’t working for you.
If it’s a big issue like never getting along with females, I’d say therapy is the way to go. If it’s specific to never getting along with females at Starbucks, then transferring is probably better.
If it’s a big issue like never getting along with females, I’d say therapy is the way to go. If it’s specific to never getting along with females at Starbucks, then transferring is probably better.
miniinovaa 1 points 3y ago
You can be rude and not know it. That’s why I explained that when I went to therapy I learned my negative behaviors and how it affects other people.
And the fact you are so defensive over some one disagreeing with you I can see how it can be thought of as rude.
Again- if women not liking you is a common theme throughout your life, maybe be a little introspective, after all, you can’t change other people only yourself and your own perception.
And the fact you are so defensive over some one disagreeing with you I can see how it can be thought of as rude.
Again- if women not liking you is a common theme throughout your life, maybe be a little introspective, after all, you can’t change other people only yourself and your own perception.
whatismineisyours 10 points 3y ago
Omg please use paragraphs
implicates_ 6 points 3y ago
i'm sorry you have to go thru this:( i believe you'll make the right decision for your next step. if i were you, i would look to transfer to another store. best of luck partner <3
mykotman12 4 points 3y ago
Sounds like it’s not a “Starbucks” problem, but a store problem aka your store is a toxic one. Can you transfer to a different location?
Marachan21 3 points 3y ago
Yeaaah, exactly my thought. Don’t blame Starbucks for your negative personal experience, instead be thankful that they are offering help through Lyra and take advantage of it. Every store is different and if you’ve had enough of it then try transferring or simply, quit the company.
Reila01 0 points 3y ago
Actually thats what i was going to do before all this quarantine stuff put things to a halt but yeah i guess it may be a store problem. But i feel i do have starbucks things i dont like but this whole situation is just the store...i literally just wanted to be barista and starbucks was my only option where i live.
Reila01 1 points 3y ago
Well from the last store meeting we had everyone was yelling at each other so yes it is a toxic work environment.
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