Ok I struggled w my attitude, and esp during the pandemic but then I got medicated lol. I'm assuming for your shift it's a symptom of burnout and stress. That doesn't excuse it of course but we're human, and it's easy to have your behavior reinforced. Maybe you could take them aside and ask if they're ok bc you've felt a lot of tension, like do it in a way that isn't accusatory or something. You guys are a team and work sucks and people have a lot going on but staying positive with each other is really important. I think trying to talk to them is wayyy better than immediately going to SM, but if they're totally unresponsive that's the next step if it's really an obstacle

I'm not defending the SSVs actions, but it is a little odd to phrase the question like that with 40 minutes to go. It does sound like you want to leave early. I usually just say, "I'm sure you're already aware, but I need to leave at my scheduled time today."

Some people just suck

you need to speak up for yourself. its cool not to want to be confrontational but obviously your coworker isn't paying you the same respect so you can politely tell them that you feel like they're being rude.

can't really say much about being rude to a customer because we all deal with stuff differently but when they said you need to work you could've said "well yeah I plan to work thats why i'm asking if there's anything I need to do so I can make sure to get out on time"

it doesn't always have to be a back and forth but definitely speak up for yourself so it doesn't turn into a habit.