I’m glad someone else is going through something similar to me, sometimes work really triggers me into not eating or drinking for awhile. It’s hard being in food service while trying to recover lol

I had anorexia BAD and I would binge drink black coffee to suppress my appetite. But it gets better. I’m 5’ 7” and i weighed 100 pounds at my lowest. I’m up 130 now and I feel better. I treat myself to the sugary drinks once in a while. I’m finally able to stop seeing food as poison.

It is a lot. As someone who has recently lost 20 pounds, it’s amazing the list of things I simply could not fit into my daily food intake. I do love that mango dragon fruit drink though. It’s a nice treat. I do miss my PSLs though.

i feel this so hard. so many people at my store get ridiculous calorie bomb drinks without even thinking and i can't help but cringe making them. then there are a few regulars who get drinks that scream ED to me and i try to be extra nice to them since i know what they're going through. i love my job but it can be so triggering

(also I'll get either quad blonde shots or black cold brew. having unfettered access to caffeine is a blessing and a curse)

What are some healthy drinks? I also have an ED but I hate most coffee... I just want something a lil healthier than my unhealthy af chai

Dang, you really didn't have to call me out like that 😅 literally on my break rn outside avoiding the food inside because I feel like I've eaten too much today.

I struggle with it. I binge for days and then don’t eat for just as long cuz I feel like shit and embarrassed with myself. I’ve told a shift before and I was completely dismissed so that was fun. I’m currently purging and only drinking water at work and no one has noticed which makes it harder

i haven’t been diagnosed officially but i have a really horrible relationship with food. i’m glad someone else feels the same way. sometimes stuff like this feels really lonely :(

Wow I just saw this thread and I have so much to share.

Sometimes customers ask how many calories are in our food items and I always get a little nervous one of my coworkers is going to notice that I know the calories in literally everything.

When coworkers make honest mistakes (like using regular vanilla instead of sugar free, or full pumps of a syrup when I just asked for one) I feel terrible for dumping the drink out, but I can’t bring myself to drink it.

I hate when coworkers offer me broken pieces of food or when my manager brings treats in for us. I know they’re nice gestures, I feel guilty for saying no, but I’m afraid it will trigger a binge.

We have one regular who occasionally asks me if I’m eating. I just laugh it off, but he actually seems genuinely concerned, and I think it’s very sweet.

I desperately wish we had more sugar free syrups. Why does everything have so much sugar???

Sometimes my body feels so incredibly weak. Like, I can’t even hold the ice bucket when it’s full and I’m on CS weak. It’s embarrassing, and I’m always exhausted.

I love warming cause I’m always cold. I hate doing the pull, also because I’m always cold.

I don’t think this is necessarily an ED thing, and I try not to be judgmental of what people order, but I’m actually concerned for the health of majority of our customers. Several of our drinks have upwards of 3 times the daily recommended intake of sugar. And people order them every single day. I know I’m disordered, but that’s not healthy. It makes me sad.

I also want to thank the egg white bites, the reduced fat turkey bacon sandwich, and the spinach and feta wrap for always being there for me when I’m hungry and restricting. They’re the best (with sriracha, of course).

I don’t have one, but I know of someone I work with that does and I try to be extra cautious with the words I use around them. I do not want them to feel worse about their ED and want to support them. I try my best to use better language around them rather than the word ‘fat’ or ‘diabetes’ etc.

I’m recovered, though technically you’re never fully recovered and I notice that it really wants to creep back up at work. The excessive sugary drinks and food orders make me a lot angrier than they should.

After 5 months working here, I realized I gained 15 pounds. I don’t drink coffee, just a strawberry acai refresher and when I try syrups (to be able to explain the taste to customers) I mix it with almond milk. I didnt even realize that I had gained so much weight because I didn’t feel like I was eating a lot, but now I feel like I don’t even want to mark anything out at work. Thank you for opening up this safe space. I hope you start to recover, I believe in you! I can only imagine how hard it can be working here with an eating disorder. You’re so strong

for sure. i’ve struggled with one for many years and while it’s not as bad as it was, some days it’s really bad. i once was “fasting” and almost fainted on the floor. but people rlly don’t realize how many calories they intake and how much sugar. it baffles me. but anyone reading this: you and your body is beautiful. it needs nutrition. please take care of yourselves💖

barista w/ an ED reporting for duty, its always really funny when people ask the calories of things and i feel like i answer a little too quickly

I send love to you all. I am on the complete opposite end of this. I eat what ever and have absolutely no concern for the amount of sugar or calories in food or drinks. So I cant imagine what your going through. But I hope you get better and find help :) ( if you want it, I'm not trying to judge)

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I’m an undiagnosed overeater... I have to eat every break and on my 30 I usually get two food items /:
I’m not exactly sure why it’s like this for me, but dieting while working at starbs is really hard. my drink is pretty low cal since I don’t put sweetener, but I do put sweet cream... luckily I don’t like sweet drinks, but the sandwiches get me every time 😫

wow idk why I was under the impression I was the only one. Working here has only made my ED worse but I love the job so much I don’t wanna leave so idk.

I have EDNOS, but restrictive, so I understand a touch. I’m wishing you a happy recovery when you take that path!! But also if you would like to try to sugar free, it may taste good in cold brew?

Just know you’re worth so much more than what others think of you, and that food is fuel for your body to keep you going. You are loved and whole as you are, and if anyone says otherwise hit them with a paper towel tube until they shut up. You got this ✨

Also I’m proud of you for opening up this discussion, bc it’s sorta unspoken among baristas for us to have EDs.

Wishing you the best of weeks rn.

Hugs to all of you 💜💖

hey, you’re not alone. i am literally in the exact same position as you are right now!! here if you ever need to talk or anything :)

I feel like a fraud. I count my calories, usually if I have a Starbucks drink, which isn’t often it’s the only thing I have that day because of all the calories. I love coffee

yesyesyes i’m going thru the exact same thing !! i miss drinking chai sm but i can’t bring myself to do it bc the calories so i’ve just been getting blonde americanos... i hate living like this and although working in food makes it a tad harder to recover, i don’t want calories to stress me for the rest of my life so we tryin !!

Please consider getting help through Lyra, it’s free. I’ve had bulimia for 20 years, it will never go away but the coping mechanisms I learned in therapy keep me in recovery.

that’s all i ever think about when i see drinks... how much sugar & calories are in everybody’s drinks. i wish i had advice, but all i can say is i’m there w you & that’s why i’m in the exact same space i was 4 years ago when i started working