i feel you should put your energy to passing those classes over filling your shifts. yes, our job takes off our mind from things outside of work but we will always have the opportunity to do that, the scholarship does not work the same way. as for the future, you’re exactly right in taking only what you can handle! you got this green bean the final two week stretch good luck!

I graduated high school last year and I started going to community college in the fall. My parents have paid for the past two semesters and it’s been worth nothing. I have not gotten any credit for any of the classes I’ve taken. I wasn’t even a full time student - I took 10 credits each semester. Fall semester I withdrew from one class and failed the other two. This spring I withdrew from all three of my classes like a month into the semester. I suffer from severe depression and Starbucks is also the only thing I have going for me. I’ve been with the company for more than a year and I love it. I feel satisfied after a hard day of doing well at what I do and I really thrive here. I’m being interviewed for a SSV position next week and I’m already a barista trainer. I don’t know if/when I’ll go back to college but I know I’m not capable of doing well right now especially in a pandemic. Just know that it’s okay to fail and sometimes necessary. I know so many people who have withdrawn from and failed countless classes in their college careers and you’re not alone. I would reach out to your professors and see if there’s anything you can work out with them. But just remember literally everybody fails a college course at some point or another. It should be much more normalized than it is. We are given a very sugarcoated preview of the college experience and so many people don’t realize it’s a very rocky process. Perhaps you can transfer to ASU online and take your time with that for now especially since it’s free and once you feel like you’re ready to go back to your previous university you can. (Or not! Life might have other plans for you.) Don’t feel too bad about failing your courses because everyone who’s been learning in this pandemic will be given some slack in that regard. Of course you also have the added pressure of losing your scholarship but again you don’t know what life has in store for you and the best you can do is decide what’s best for you here and now. It’s great that you’ve scheduled an appointment with a psychiatrist. Medication can really help. I would also recommend taking advantage of Starbuck’s Lyra benefit. I’m currently seeing a therapist once a week for free with it. I think picking up more hours might be good for you for now. I’ve been working a lot recently since I’m not in school and of course that hasn’t solved all my problems but being here gives me a sense of purpose and I like going to work and coming home and not worrying about school for now. Maybe take this time to find yourself and meet new people and experience life before going back to school! You don’t have to get your degree in 4 solid years and people rarely do. Think about what you really want and focus on your mental health.

Sorry this was such a disorganized and long post! I just really relate to a lot of what you’ve said and I genuinely want you to know you’re not alone and you have options. You don’t have to trap yourself into what you think you have to do or what’s expected of you. Best of luck 💛

feels like i wrote this post.. dm me if u need anything, i’m in a similar position :)

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DM’ed you