I have not been with starbucks for a long time, but I have worked a lot of customer service jobs in general and I think I understand. I eventually reached a point where I no longer smile or consciously try to be bubbly. I am polite and I will help customers when I can (making sure they are rung up as cheaply as possible, making eye contact and giving each person my undivided attention when helping them etc) but I have ultimately found that I feel best when nothing is forced. If I genuinely find someone cool I might make conversation about it. Otherwise I leave people alone and may finish multiple transactions without speaking lol. I have found a lot of introverts simply want their coffee and interestingly enough appreciate this.

These are rough times, you're doing great for sticking with it. 😊

Have you taken time off? How much vacation have you had since the pandemic started? Did you take leave during March/April 2020 or did you work straight through?

It sounds like you're dealing with some burnout, and could use some time off to regain your sense of self. Even a stay-cation if you can't afford to travel. Mute all your work chats and everything, and truly disconnect from the job for 5-7 days if you have the vacation hours saved to be able to do that.

If you're the type to get overwhelmed with tech, you might find a Tech Fast Weekend (shut off all your electronics and do some analog shit for 2-3 days) might be beneficial. It's like going on a retreat without actually having to retreat!

If you don't already use Lyra, my therapist has been super helpful with work burnout and also helping me find ways to cope with work issues like clashes with management or handling the surrounding burnout of everyone else I work with.

Weirdly, making coffee at home is helping me. At one point I totally stopped drinking coffee except at work, and the strangest thing has happened since I've switched that. I stick to water at work, and when I get home I make myself a cup of coffee and have a snack. The caffeine boosts me over the slump I run into when the workplace adrenaline wears off, the ritual gives me a chance to actually *appreciate* the drink I'm enjoying, and it's still early enough in the day that it doesn't interfere with my bedtime schedule. (The coffee is still free because I mark out the beans, and I've definitely marked out a cup of milk and a few pumps of syrup from time to time too.) Divorcing my enjoyment of coffee from my duties at work has brought back some of the joy in it for me, which has actually helped me enjoy serving the coffee more. Does that make any sense at all?