Starbucks Baristas: The daily grind
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rant: customers who tell too much about their lives (self.starbucksbaristas)
submitted by Oliviaaa-21
just a small rant, but I just have such a hard time when customers share hard things going on in their life. Part of me wants to be helpful and be there to support but for serious things there is only so much as a barista I can do. Today I made a woman cry in drive thru. She told me her week was rough and I responded saying “I hope as your week goes on it does get better!” And she started crying saying her daughter just died. I couldn’t even say much other than I was sorry for her loss, but after that my mood for the rest of my shift was shifted. I felt so awful, but with window times and line behind her I couldn’t offer much more to say. I don’t want to sound rude, but with conversation like that it’s so hard to know what to say, and I usually end up feeling bad that I couldn’t do much :( I can’t change how it is, but if anyone else related to situations like I hope you don’t take it out on yourself and just do your best to be kind, we never know what people are going through.
RavenMcG 27 points 11m ago
I feel awful when stuff like that happens.
But I often wonder why they choose to disclose that or even come to get coffee. When my sister died the last thing I wanted to do was get coffee.
But I often wonder why they choose to disclose that or even come to get coffee. When my sister died the last thing I wanted to do was get coffee.
OneRoseDark 21 points 11m ago
"i am so, so sorry to hear that. i hope you have lots of support and that you're kind to yourself while you're grieving. hang in there."
sometimes the best thing you can do when someone spouts inappropriate grief at you is tell them that you hear them and you wish them the best. a little human "i see you" is the best gift you have for them, you know?
i work at a cafe store and have the luxury of having a little more time to connect with people. if that were tossed over the bar at me i would set down my work long enough to make eye contact while saying something like the above, then pick back up with a "would you like to tell me about her?" and just serve as a pleasant NPC listener if that's what they needed.
sometimes the best thing you can do when someone spouts inappropriate grief at you is tell them that you hear them and you wish them the best. a little human "i see you" is the best gift you have for them, you know?
i work at a cafe store and have the luxury of having a little more time to connect with people. if that were tossed over the bar at me i would set down my work long enough to make eye contact while saying something like the above, then pick back up with a "would you like to tell me about her?" and just serve as a pleasant NPC listener if that's what they needed.
Mea-fae_Owl73 8 points 11m ago
There are no words to make things better so don’t feel bad. The fact that you cared and it showed made an impact. You were there when she needed a moment. I had a regular customer recently tell me that their partner asked for a divorce. I immediately hugged them, gave my condolences, and let them know I would be holding space for them if they needed to talk. It’s what I felt comfortable to do for them in that moment. I once asked a family I had never seen before what they were up to for the weekend. They told me that they traveled from out of state for a funeral. That they just need some coffee before heading to the family get together. I immediately told them I was sorry for their loss. I asked them how long it had been since they had last seen their relatives and that lead to a beautiful conversation. What you can do is all that is ever required.
cpv_91 3 points 11m ago
I'm sorry this left you feeling as if you fell short. I'm sure your words were heard as they were said, with feeling from a place of caring.
One of the reasons I have never wanted to work in a DT is that need to cut conversations short for the sake of the line and drive times. I've been with the siren a long time and have only ever worked a cafe, the same cafe in fact, and it's allowed me the opportunity to form some wonderful connections and friendships. I've also had sad news dropped on me as well but have had the situational opportunity to pause what I'm doing, hand it off to someone, and come out from behind the line to offer that person the moment of comfort they needed.
I know we don't get paid to be counselors but it doesn't cost us anything to be human. ❤️
One of the reasons I have never wanted to work in a DT is that need to cut conversations short for the sake of the line and drive times. I've been with the siren a long time and have only ever worked a cafe, the same cafe in fact, and it's allowed me the opportunity to form some wonderful connections and friendships. I've also had sad news dropped on me as well but have had the situational opportunity to pause what I'm doing, hand it off to someone, and come out from behind the line to offer that person the moment of comfort they needed.
I know we don't get paid to be counselors but it doesn't cost us anything to be human. ❤️
aspiringgrandpa 2 points 11m ago
nah fr people need to start getting therapy and stop trauma dumping on cashiers
zzid2d21 1 points 11m ago
You didn’t make her cry! What was going on in her life made her cry. The simple act of being kind and wishing her well most likely overwhelmed her emotionally and the tears fell. When you are going through a tough time and barely holding things together and someone is nice to you? It can mean the world when your world is falling apart. You did a good, kind, decent, human thing and it may not seem to you like you did much, but I guarantee that woman remembers “that nice barista”.
Jena876543 0 points 11m ago
I never try to be therapist, if you tell me your week has sucked I just nod along with you
ricardimus 0 points 11m ago
This is why I seldom ask “how’s your day” and never ask “any plans?”
Like at the moment I’m incapable of taking a legitimate interest. So why do they make us ask “for customer connection scores?”
Like at the moment I’m incapable of taking a legitimate interest. So why do they make us ask “for customer connection scores?”
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