so remember how we were all complaining about the kiwi turning everything green? how we all cheered and celebrated its inevitable death? my store even replaced all the stained pitchers and we were all excited over the new, clear pitchers.

Starbucks Introduces New Pineapple Passionfruit Refresher

enter: pineapple. the son of kiwi, here for vengeance. unsuspecting baristas making pineapple backups in any pitcher available. customers complaining that their iced coffee tastes like perfume. "man, what's up with the iced coffee these days?"

too late, we realized what the pineapple had done. too late, we stare in horror at the rack full of yellow pitchers not even urnex can salvage.

haunting us.

taunting us.

will we ever know peace?