I was in Tim Hortons today. Some guy was complaining his order was taking to long, and the worker goes;

"I am only one person. 3 people called in sick today. I said 3 minutes for your hashbrown. Standing there talking AT me isn't going to make it go any faster but it is going to make every other customer in here mad because you're taking me away from their order. Sit down and relax or I can cancel your order in 3 minutes."


I was SO jealous.

Stop seeing angry customers as humans. Helped me when I worked there.

i smoke weed. a lot of it.

i have a store manager that allows us to deny a customer service when they become hostile and verbally aggressive so 🤷🏽‍♀️ i just started sending them away.

I wish I had more of a helpful answer. Remember that there's plenty of these people that you won't see again. But for those you do, just don't give them the energy. they do not deserve it. Be short and quiet with them, there's still room to be polite and not get in trouble when doing that. minimal interaction and make sure it's as dry and unfeeling as possible. I've seen customers get genuinely uncomfortable when i do this haha. ill be nice and cheery while greeting them but if they arent semi decent to me i shut off the fake smile and theyre shocked. I've been in this type of customer service for 6 years, and honestly I've mostly just learned to be angry about it. I'm angry about the fact that people don't view service workers as human beings but deem our job essential for society. and im angry not everyone can see its a problem, or why. I wish there was more we could do about it ://

Me and my co-workers reinforce each other's humanity really fucking hard. When there's a rude customer, at the bare minimum you can acknowledge the barista who was just chastised. Say you're on peak and you can't have a convo. Just give them a look and acknowledge what they went through. Or say, hey, you alright?

Obviously this is much harder if your fellow workers aren't doing this for you, it's hard to just be the only one doing it

We talk a ton of shit at my store, and it makes all the difference

Also were super kind to each other, we make drinks for each other and help each other with advice and stuff

I cope by doing the same shit to them, they’re nothing more than papas mocharia characters to me

I tried, but quitting was the only way

my slightly jungian, slightly buddhist advice is to think of them as babies. they are ignorant beings, they’re asleep, the things they’re worrying about and invested in are so mind numbingly simple and meaningless. i used to be so upset by them, when i started i felt exactly how you’re feeling. but now i mostly just have pity for them. can you imagine how sad and empty their lives are?

it’s tough to do, and takes practice and mindfulness, but remaining completely calm and polite and unbothered has been my best strategy. when they can’t get a reaction out of you, when *their* reaction is juxtaposed with kindness and gentleness, it seems to embarrass them. because they should be embarrassed! making a scene, throwing a tantrum because they didn’t get their sugar flavored caffeinated pacifier in under a minute. the reactions they’re having, the way that they’re responding to he world around them, is like an infant. infants want to be comforted and to feel heard, so you have to be their mommy.

this sounds like a joke, but man, it works. swear to god it’s like starbies customers all have breastfeeding trauma 😪 there is something psychologically, developmentally wrong with an adult who acts out like that, and in public, toward strangers who are *doing them a favor*, no less. a healthy and balanced person does not engage in that kind of behavior. when they do this, you have to remember that you are not the one doing anything wrong, you are trying to go about your day peacefully and get a paycheck.

when i started, i used to bring a lot home with me. i spent way too much time thinking about people who don’t deserve a second of my life. try to avoid this, because constantly thinking of the worst aspects of the job will make those aspects stand out even more. all you gotta do is show up, get paid, and try not to let it disrupt your inner peace. starbucks does not deserve to take up that much space in your head. i wish it could be different, and if we’re presented with opportunities to create any kind of positive change then we should take them (union!!!), but as long as you gotta work under the current circumstances, do your best to leave it at work. whats that thing people say, like, unbothered and moisturized?? that’s how we gotta be lol. you are strong you are resilient you possess great emotional fortitude, you got this! <3

edit: imagine that instead of working in a coffee shop you’re actually a psychologist watching an insane experiment play out. idk if this counts as “maladaptive daydreaming” but my god does it make the shit funny

Been doing this for over seven years now, and even though I'm a Tarbucks barista, I've learned to lean into my regulars and make those genuine connections with them and forget about the ones who treat me like garbage.

i don’t. at this point i just say “it is what it fucking is” and go on with my day. my SM loves to give these pep talks that go like “they’re just an asshole! don’t let someone miserable in their own life put a damper on yours!”

and like, yeah i shouldn’t let it get to me but it’s *hard* when i’m already coming to work burnt out, in a bad place mentally, just to have every other customer verbally abuse me for shit i have no control over. it’s so hard to not walk out almost days because these people are just downright disgusting humans inside. i despise our customer base, i so wish my area paid more or else i’d leave this pos company

I learned, back in the day (mostly from a short-lived experience as a social-media influencer) that what people say, or think about YOU, is actually what they think about themselves, that they can’t really bear to consciously admit that they think. They’re projecting their own deeply-seated self-loathing and self-hatred and the worthlessness that they feel about themselves, onto someone-else, so that they can express it, without admitting it’s themself they’re talking about. So mostly, I pity people like that, because they feel so dreadful that they’re spilling over onto everyone else.

It’s a bit tragic really. 🥺

I act like an ass back

Well for the most part we are all strangers to each other and therefore don’t really know whether to trust each other, overall I try to be polite to retail and food service workers but I’ve seen some truly rude and ignorant customers 😕 it’s sad but overall strangers don’t really react that well to kindness from other strangers because they don’t trust it (aka they are instinctively scared of being conned)

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Honestly knowing that I’m a modern day peasant becomes a little easier when I remember even the queen couldn’t avoid death. 🤣 that one day we all die equally so I disassociate to try and be as comfortable as possible.

Also cannabis. I smoke a lot of pot.

Treat them like NPCS. They get generated, some leave and are never seen again, others have a few lines where they’re meant to be angry, blah blah blah. That always helps for me.

This is a sweet and vulnerable post. While I identify with this feeling at times, I find it is most often when im stuck in my head and feeling sad about something else. I try to remember at work that peoples reactions to me are often not about me at all, but more about where they’re at or what they’re going through. Maybe try a mindset of… how can I serve this moment without keeping myself at its center? Funnily enough, this is NOT my default way of thinking.. but I find when I’m feeling the way you explained.. this inner shift always serves me well.

Me and my friends were going through this the other day on shift . One of my shifts said all she really wants is to feel acknowledge . “A great job, keep it up” but I’m the end All you get it “WHAA YOUR OUT OF THIS” , “watch your times times times times!!!

start seeing the customers as less than human

you just have to find a way to desensitize yourself to it and stop caring what the shitty customers think… at the end of the day, it’s just a job, and these people are (either internationally or inadvertently) projecting the negativity from their lives onto the baristas… you just have to recognize that and not let it get to you.

by the time i reached my final few months at sbux, i would just be deadpan staring at the customers who yelled and lost their shit at us, lowkey smiling under my mask bc at that point i just found it funny how miserable they must be that they feel the need to do this to random strangers working at a coffee shop

I remember the customers who are very nice to me and then when I see them next I always make sure to tell them how much I appreciate them. Sometimes I think about comping one of their drinks but I haven’t done that yet

Don’t give it your all #1 and honestly just do the bare minimum get paid and get out

Smoke and drink my sorrow away, forgetting I work at Starbucks

Astral project